Blogging, Ranting and Friendships

I started this blog with the intent of keeping my family and friends on the other side of the pond in touch with me since it would be more accessible than the live journal one, it's also easier to post pictures for everyone to view.

Unfortunatly I've really started to hate blogging. Maybe it's because it doesn't seem to matter. The people I want to touch don't comment, and I'm not even sure if they read it, and the people I do want to get to know better are impossible to know through blogs.

So I'm venting here, it seems appropriate since it's about blogger to vent here. I'm tired of making superficial friends through blogs (not just this one specifically) and of generally being unable to connect with others. I've also been having this problem on the hoem front and many of my old friends have been trying to get in contact with me, to only feel like they don't want to be my friend, just to have what they always had: an ear to listen to.

I at least have Liz and Carol and I'm really grateful for them. I hope to continue to cultivate friendships with them, but it's really frustrating trying to expand having friends. Even people who call me from church are only interested in either information or help. I hope I odn't come across that way myself.

Anyways, Carol is coming over this week to help me out a bit with some housework stuff since I've been really sick. Although by Thursday I could be back to work and fine and normal :) (fingers crossed anyway) And today I see Liz, which will be great she's such a good friend of mine. I think I'll make her a card today to tell her thanks.

I'm just generally feeling pessimistic about the friends front online and needing to find that fufillment elsewhere is hard when I have one child and another on the way. It will be good to move to trowbridge because there's no playgroups where I live that are free and I can't afford to go to ones you have to pay. It would be lovely to meet some other women who have similiar intersts as me.