Today, and the past two weeks I have been like a rodent in a cage. I have my food bowl (my kitchen), my warm nesting place (my bed), and even a rodent wheel (my exercise bike), but yet I feel trapped. I hate being set back, even in the most rewarding of times. When the novelty of a new child wears off, much like that of a pet, you still give it attention and love, and yet you do what is nessecary and not going the extra mile.
It's been excruciatingly painful for me not to have the support of my maternal family, and extended family in this precious time of my life. And like all things caged, I am unable to do anything about my situation. I cannot make my body heal faster, I cannot expect to lose the pregnancy weight immediatly. I cannot make my body and mind stop wishing it were still pregnant. And worse, I can't stop the cloud that hangs over this guilded cage leaving me without joy or satisfaction in my self and in my newborn child.
So I pretend to be happy in front of other people, but my husband, and myself know what lurks behind the smiles. A restless, listless rodent, spinning the wheels in her head, going around teh same set of events and wondering how I trapped myself here, and how to make myself happier. Would I change it if I could?: Always the same answer- No. But why then am I so unhappy? My only answer. Hormones, lack of contact with the sunshine and outside world, and a body which is foriegn, strange, and not mine anymore.
I am not only trapped in my own home, but I am trapped in myself, with doubts I'll ever resurface to find me. Thank God I have an anchor that brings me back to myself, a constant sunshine, my wonderful husband. But I must admit, even that only allievates the pain, it doesn't solve it.
I have a lot of soul searching to do, and I must be patient with myself and my current situation. I think it's time to get back into art, and release these negative hormonal emotions, so I don't keep them inside anymore. I love being a mother and a wife. But who am I anymore?
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Saturday, December 08, 2007
The first week
I can't believe my daughter is one week old. This week has been a bit crazy. We've all been sick, including Natasha. (excluding Rose thankfully) and I've been breastfeeding while being sick. Amazingly I am still going strong. Thanks to Lanolin, which is a lifesaver. It's basically a cream specifically for breastfeeding mums and let me tell you it works wonders.
Alex is still sick, he's worried he has bronchitis so we're seeing a doctor later today. I myself have been up too long and need sleep. But breastfeeding makes me a bit wired physically so I need to wear myself down before exhaustion lets me sleep.
Also my brain is going in circles because of a recent proposal my mother made for our family to come back to the U.S.A.
Anyways, we're very seriously considering it. With that tantalizing tidbit I will leave the details for a later date. As well as more pictures. Life is so much more amusing than anything anyone could make up. I love it.
Alex is still sick, he's worried he has bronchitis so we're seeing a doctor later today. I myself have been up too long and need sleep. But breastfeeding makes me a bit wired physically so I need to wear myself down before exhaustion lets me sleep.
Also my brain is going in circles because of a recent proposal my mother made for our family to come back to the U.S.A.
Anyways, we're very seriously considering it. With that tantalizing tidbit I will leave the details for a later date. As well as more pictures. Life is so much more amusing than anything anyone could make up. I love it.
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
The Real Deal
On Friday the 30th of November, I last posted in my blog about the successful Cephalic Version. Unfortunatly my waters did not break in the hospital, but I was lucky in that I did still start labor that evening.
It started with a rainy night, Christmas Lights, a family outing. Alex and I had decided to treat ourselves to movies since christmas will be rather slim this year and besides we were looking forward to the best christmas present ever: Rosemarie.
The day had been pleasant as I traveled home, and I was in high spirits. I had decided for myself to try everything in my power to get contractions started as I knew this would be the oppertune moment. The baby was head down, I was already off my blood thinner medication from that morning and I was past the 37 week marker. Hence the bus travel home, as i ws on the bus I bumped into my husbands best friends girlfriend. She was also a work colleague, and a very lovely young woman. We chit chatted till I got off at my bus stop, and then I walked a forth of a mile home.
I knew getting contractions started wouldn't be hard, it would be keeping them that would be the problem. So, after walking home, I enticed alex to some alone time, seeing as it would most likely be the last he'd be getting for a VERY long time. When that failed to work, I asked him to make curry for dinner, and started doing vigorous housework. Up until this point I had been trying everything in my power to make the contractions go away, so it was quite bizzarre to have the go-ahead to try to get into labor. I must have started having contractions about that point, but being the skeptic I am, I wrote them off as braxton-hicks.
This was about 4 in the afternoon. We had decided at this point, even with the bleary weather to go out and get a few items from the store and get a movie to watch for dinner. Besides Alex was missing some essential curry items to finish the meal. So we walked into town, bundling up Natasha for the rainy weather. It was already dark outside. I remembering asking alex to stop at the public toilets, even though I'd already went right before we left. I suppose that should have clued me in, but with the whole irritable uterus I had been diagnosed with, I decided it was no pain no gain anyway and still ignored the contractions.
After walking around town for an hour we got home with all our supplies and I was really having a hard time at this point. Holding a conversation was not even possible. I took care of natasha's needs first, and then the groceries, and then I collapsed on all fours in the living room whimpering. I think at that point I finnally convinced myself, and my husband that this was the real thing. So I asked him to call the hospital for me. Unfortunatly, we don't have a car, so getting me there was proving a bit of a problem. We had used the rest of our change on a taxi back home in the first place, so a taxi was also out of the question.
I wasn't really in the right frame of mind to do anything about any of this, and in the end we got an ambulance to drive me from one side of town to the other. Unfortunatly, it was the christmas lights bananza and all the main roads had been blocked off. I don't really recall how long it took to get there, as I was on Gas and Air (Laughing Gas) the whole time. When they checked me into the maternity Unit in town, they called up Bath to see if I needed to go up there, but was told I didn't need to. Which was great as the local hospital was much more cosy, and as I found out later I was the only one giving birth there that evening. By now the time was 7:30 pm, and I got checked by a midwife, to find out I was already 5 cm dialated and partially effaced. Unfortunatly, my waters STILL hadn't broken.
I called alex, and he made it in for 8:30 after our mother-in-law agreed to watch Natasha. No one was believing the baby was actually coming, and who was to blame them? I had had so many false alarms that at this point even I Was still second-guessing myself. However 3 hours into labor I was another cm dialated, and slightly more effeaced, but it was taking a long time to progress it seemed like. They called up bath again, and got the go-ahead to break my waters. I was so thrilled, at this point it meant there was no turning back! This baby really was coming.
I had a very mobile birth, or as far as was possible since they kept a close moniter on my child's heart beat because she just had a very low base line (110-115bps). I tried to keep on my feet as much as possible but the whole birht my contractions never got closer than 4 minutes apart. They were intense, but never close together. I stayed on gas and air until 7 cm dialated after my waters had been broken for me. I dont know if my body know how to break waters really. Or maybe that's just the way my body labors.
In any case, I asked for some pethadine, but I was reluctant to take it, since it was a morphine-based drug, and could pass into the placenta, making both myself and the child drowsy. I didn't want to prolong this birth any more than nessecary. It was already close to 7 hours and 45 mins into labor, and I was really tired, hot, had been sick multiple times, and just wanted this over and done with.
Alex was a constant support, he sang to me to calm me down, rubbed my back and held my hand. He would rub a damp cloth on my face neck and back. Most of those details are fuzzy as I was a bit delirious at this point, and not from pethadine. That would take at least 20 minutes to get into my system as an injection. However, I do remember clearly asking alex for a blessing to help this labor along, as I was terrified the pethadine would affect the baby, but the pain was intolerable. Alex gave me a sweet short blessing.
(FYI: For those who don't know the Latter-Day Saint Faith, a Blessing is an act, much like biblical times, when a man with the proper Priesthood authority lays their hands upon a persons head to administer words, comfort and even healing from God. The church's explination of the Priesthood and blessings can be found www.mormon.org).
I believe that blessing calmed me down a lot, and I felt as though angel's gathered around me in support of such a special moment, because I felt the urge to push and it was beautiful. I recall little of the pain now, as all I can remember is standing up, then on the bed on all fours, screaming. I wasn't sceaming in panic, just in a very gutteral primal way, that only childbirth can bring out in someone. I felt her head emerge, and I had to wait three long painful minutes until the rest of her came out. I had three pushes, and my child, including placenta was born. Rosemarie Sue.
She was and is gorgeous. She is smaller than my first, and I only slightly tore. I had no abnormal bleeding, and I was about to go home in less than 24 hours. I was so relieved to have it over, and guess what, the pethadine kicked in right after birth, 15 minutes later, to relieve me of the horrible after birth pains that you can get.
All in all, I have to say that delivery was the closest to perfect anyone could expect to get. In the end I didn't even use the gas and air, as I just needed to be in that moment. I really relish this birth experience and I feel like I've come out a stronger, healthier, and more emotionally stable person than before. Even with all the complications before hand, and the worry about my DVT, all of it was taken care of, and I can't help but praise God for his hand in this event in my life.
Because really, holding my child after she was born, really only proved that God is real. He gave me such a precious gift in the birth and in my child. I love both my children so dearly.
It started with a rainy night, Christmas Lights, a family outing. Alex and I had decided to treat ourselves to movies since christmas will be rather slim this year and besides we were looking forward to the best christmas present ever: Rosemarie.
The day had been pleasant as I traveled home, and I was in high spirits. I had decided for myself to try everything in my power to get contractions started as I knew this would be the oppertune moment. The baby was head down, I was already off my blood thinner medication from that morning and I was past the 37 week marker. Hence the bus travel home, as i ws on the bus I bumped into my husbands best friends girlfriend. She was also a work colleague, and a very lovely young woman. We chit chatted till I got off at my bus stop, and then I walked a forth of a mile home.
I knew getting contractions started wouldn't be hard, it would be keeping them that would be the problem. So, after walking home, I enticed alex to some alone time, seeing as it would most likely be the last he'd be getting for a VERY long time. When that failed to work, I asked him to make curry for dinner, and started doing vigorous housework. Up until this point I had been trying everything in my power to make the contractions go away, so it was quite bizzarre to have the go-ahead to try to get into labor. I must have started having contractions about that point, but being the skeptic I am, I wrote them off as braxton-hicks.
This was about 4 in the afternoon. We had decided at this point, even with the bleary weather to go out and get a few items from the store and get a movie to watch for dinner. Besides Alex was missing some essential curry items to finish the meal. So we walked into town, bundling up Natasha for the rainy weather. It was already dark outside. I remembering asking alex to stop at the public toilets, even though I'd already went right before we left. I suppose that should have clued me in, but with the whole irritable uterus I had been diagnosed with, I decided it was no pain no gain anyway and still ignored the contractions.
After walking around town for an hour we got home with all our supplies and I was really having a hard time at this point. Holding a conversation was not even possible. I took care of natasha's needs first, and then the groceries, and then I collapsed on all fours in the living room whimpering. I think at that point I finnally convinced myself, and my husband that this was the real thing. So I asked him to call the hospital for me. Unfortunatly, we don't have a car, so getting me there was proving a bit of a problem. We had used the rest of our change on a taxi back home in the first place, so a taxi was also out of the question.
I wasn't really in the right frame of mind to do anything about any of this, and in the end we got an ambulance to drive me from one side of town to the other. Unfortunatly, it was the christmas lights bananza and all the main roads had been blocked off. I don't really recall how long it took to get there, as I was on Gas and Air (Laughing Gas) the whole time. When they checked me into the maternity Unit in town, they called up Bath to see if I needed to go up there, but was told I didn't need to. Which was great as the local hospital was much more cosy, and as I found out later I was the only one giving birth there that evening. By now the time was 7:30 pm, and I got checked by a midwife, to find out I was already 5 cm dialated and partially effaced. Unfortunatly, my waters STILL hadn't broken.
I called alex, and he made it in for 8:30 after our mother-in-law agreed to watch Natasha. No one was believing the baby was actually coming, and who was to blame them? I had had so many false alarms that at this point even I Was still second-guessing myself. However 3 hours into labor I was another cm dialated, and slightly more effeaced, but it was taking a long time to progress it seemed like. They called up bath again, and got the go-ahead to break my waters. I was so thrilled, at this point it meant there was no turning back! This baby really was coming.
I had a very mobile birth, or as far as was possible since they kept a close moniter on my child's heart beat because she just had a very low base line (110-115bps). I tried to keep on my feet as much as possible but the whole birht my contractions never got closer than 4 minutes apart. They were intense, but never close together. I stayed on gas and air until 7 cm dialated after my waters had been broken for me. I dont know if my body know how to break waters really. Or maybe that's just the way my body labors.
In any case, I asked for some pethadine, but I was reluctant to take it, since it was a morphine-based drug, and could pass into the placenta, making both myself and the child drowsy. I didn't want to prolong this birth any more than nessecary. It was already close to 7 hours and 45 mins into labor, and I was really tired, hot, had been sick multiple times, and just wanted this over and done with.
Alex was a constant support, he sang to me to calm me down, rubbed my back and held my hand. He would rub a damp cloth on my face neck and back. Most of those details are fuzzy as I was a bit delirious at this point, and not from pethadine. That would take at least 20 minutes to get into my system as an injection. However, I do remember clearly asking alex for a blessing to help this labor along, as I was terrified the pethadine would affect the baby, but the pain was intolerable. Alex gave me a sweet short blessing.
(FYI: For those who don't know the Latter-Day Saint Faith, a Blessing is an act, much like biblical times, when a man with the proper Priesthood authority lays their hands upon a persons head to administer words, comfort and even healing from God. The church's explination of the Priesthood and blessings can be found www.mormon.org).
I believe that blessing calmed me down a lot, and I felt as though angel's gathered around me in support of such a special moment, because I felt the urge to push and it was beautiful. I recall little of the pain now, as all I can remember is standing up, then on the bed on all fours, screaming. I wasn't sceaming in panic, just in a very gutteral primal way, that only childbirth can bring out in someone. I felt her head emerge, and I had to wait three long painful minutes until the rest of her came out. I had three pushes, and my child, including placenta was born. Rosemarie Sue.
She was and is gorgeous. She is smaller than my first, and I only slightly tore. I had no abnormal bleeding, and I was about to go home in less than 24 hours. I was so relieved to have it over, and guess what, the pethadine kicked in right after birth, 15 minutes later, to relieve me of the horrible after birth pains that you can get.
All in all, I have to say that delivery was the closest to perfect anyone could expect to get. In the end I didn't even use the gas and air, as I just needed to be in that moment. I really relish this birth experience and I feel like I've come out a stronger, healthier, and more emotionally stable person than before. Even with all the complications before hand, and the worry about my DVT, all of it was taken care of, and I can't help but praise God for his hand in this event in my life.
Because really, holding my child after she was born, really only proved that God is real. He gave me such a precious gift in the birth and in my child. I love both my children so dearly.
Monday, December 03, 2007
Introducing Rosemarie Sue
Born on December 1st, 2007 at 3:07am GMT. Weighing 6lbs 7 oz.
Here's is a few pictures since then :D Birth Story and more pictures coming shortly.
FYI this picture is of my mother-in-law Glen, eldest daughter Natasha, and youngest daughter Rose.
Here's is a few pictures since then :D Birth Story and more pictures coming shortly.
FYI this picture is of my mother-in-law Glen, eldest daughter Natasha, and youngest daughter Rose.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Home is where the Heart Is...
The Heart Moniter that is!
Since my last post I have been admitted to the hospital twice more, (for the same contractions), and just went to my 37 week checkup with my doctor yesterday. I am yet again on my way up there this morning to get the baby turned around. And if I get contractions, all the better because then I could be delivering my child today, and be done with the last two crazy weeks.
Sometimes I wonder just how much strain a person can take? But let me tell you it's still all very exciting! Depsite having had a rough two weeks, I am so chuffed at the possibility of getting induced and having little Rose in our home. It's amazing how your body responds to these things, and even as recent as last night I was in agony, it is now a distant memory and I am rejoicing in a lot of good things that have happened in my little life sphere.
So let me recap a bit of the highlights and lowlights of the weeks.
The lowest part besides me bumping around from one hospital visit to the next, is that I neglected my poor hampster and it has given up the ghost. It's not surprising we forgot about her as so many people have been in my household this last week and we just didnt have the proper instructions to feed/take care of our hampster. What's really heartbreaking is how upset it was for my husband since it was his birthday present a year ago. And how my 18 month old walks around the house going "Hah-haze" repeatedly. This is how she said the hampster's name: Hazel. She really enjoyed that little critter. But this is life, and when you have very little support for taking care of your daughter, it's hard to remmeber to take care of a rodent too.
Anyways, the high points have been finishing my counselling sessions and the amount of good it has done for my relationships with all my family members. I won't go into the gritty details, but, my father's side of the family did inflict some serious personal mental/emotional/physical scars on me, and they needed to be delt with. Now they are and I can't express my gratitude to God for this maricle in my life. I thought I'd be harboring anger and resentment until my last breath about it all.
The other really great news is the bridges that I had so worried I had burned with my mother are actually almost repaired. So not only have I almost completely fixed all past personal problems with my father, but I'm well on my way to having a stress free relationship with my mother! Not only that, she's wanting us to move back to America to help her with business endeavors. Which unfortunatly would take another post entirely to talk about and suss out all the details. So I won't bore you here, but we are seriously considering it.
The other highlight, and the biggest one of course is all the medical good news I'm having about this pregnancy. My Version as stated before is today, Alex is on early Paternity leave, and the arrival of a new child all on it's own is the best news I could have. Even if the version doesnt work, they will schedule me for a last resort c-section on the 7th of december. Because of my other health problems it would be safter for the baby to be delivered this way than breach and vaginal.
So here I am, nervous as anything to go in today, and hoping that if I am admitted it's because I have a little girl in my arms, not because I'm going to go home empty handed. My husband will be on-call all day should I find out I need him to rush up to be part of the delivery. So now it's just a few more hours of "wait and see". Aren't you excited too? :D We're going to have another little baby!
Since my last post I have been admitted to the hospital twice more, (for the same contractions), and just went to my 37 week checkup with my doctor yesterday. I am yet again on my way up there this morning to get the baby turned around. And if I get contractions, all the better because then I could be delivering my child today, and be done with the last two crazy weeks.
Sometimes I wonder just how much strain a person can take? But let me tell you it's still all very exciting! Depsite having had a rough two weeks, I am so chuffed at the possibility of getting induced and having little Rose in our home. It's amazing how your body responds to these things, and even as recent as last night I was in agony, it is now a distant memory and I am rejoicing in a lot of good things that have happened in my little life sphere.
So let me recap a bit of the highlights and lowlights of the weeks.
The lowest part besides me bumping around from one hospital visit to the next, is that I neglected my poor hampster and it has given up the ghost. It's not surprising we forgot about her as so many people have been in my household this last week and we just didnt have the proper instructions to feed/take care of our hampster. What's really heartbreaking is how upset it was for my husband since it was his birthday present a year ago. And how my 18 month old walks around the house going "Hah-haze" repeatedly. This is how she said the hampster's name: Hazel. She really enjoyed that little critter. But this is life, and when you have very little support for taking care of your daughter, it's hard to remmeber to take care of a rodent too.
Anyways, the high points have been finishing my counselling sessions and the amount of good it has done for my relationships with all my family members. I won't go into the gritty details, but, my father's side of the family did inflict some serious personal mental/emotional/physical scars on me, and they needed to be delt with. Now they are and I can't express my gratitude to God for this maricle in my life. I thought I'd be harboring anger and resentment until my last breath about it all.
The other really great news is the bridges that I had so worried I had burned with my mother are actually almost repaired. So not only have I almost completely fixed all past personal problems with my father, but I'm well on my way to having a stress free relationship with my mother! Not only that, she's wanting us to move back to America to help her with business endeavors. Which unfortunatly would take another post entirely to talk about and suss out all the details. So I won't bore you here, but we are seriously considering it.
The other highlight, and the biggest one of course is all the medical good news I'm having about this pregnancy. My Version as stated before is today, Alex is on early Paternity leave, and the arrival of a new child all on it's own is the best news I could have. Even if the version doesnt work, they will schedule me for a last resort c-section on the 7th of december. Because of my other health problems it would be safter for the baby to be delivered this way than breach and vaginal.
So here I am, nervous as anything to go in today, and hoping that if I am admitted it's because I have a little girl in my arms, not because I'm going to go home empty handed. My husband will be on-call all day should I find out I need him to rush up to be part of the delivery. So now it's just a few more hours of "wait and see". Aren't you excited too? :D We're going to have another little baby!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Painful Indecisions: "Inny" or "Outty"
The last 48 hours have been like a bizzare rollercoaster ride. Or just a very strange waking dream.
It started with contractions on sunday at 35 weeks pregnant. By monday I had shrugged them off and started getting the house hold ready (cleaning and such) for the baby. Packing my bags for the hospital in the next 4 weeks, and going to a doctors appointment that morning.
It was one of those really terribly cold and miserable mornings, and my mood was all over the place. I didn't feel like writing, the contractions from the day before we're like having a bee next to my ear that wouldn't go away, and I wasn't looking forward to going all the way across town in the rain and cold. It was dark, damp, and gross outside, and all I have in the way of shoes is 2 pairs of sandals, and a pair of ballerina pumps. I opted for the last option, and cleverly found a solution to my problems: Get a bus across town. So I figured out the time I needed to be out there waiting and rushed around getting everything ready.
By the time I got to where I thought the bus stop was, it wasnt there. I asked a few other hurried people if they knew where it was, and the they all seemed to look at me like I was stupid and said it would be faster to walk there. And yes, when you're healthy, not pushing a pram in the rain, and not 35 weeks pregnant with contractions that morning, walking WOULD be easier! However that was not the case for me. In the end I looked up and down the street only to be at a loss for this bus stop, and fearing missing my appointment, I had little choice but to walk. By this time my daughter is screaming, and I'm pretty much soaked through since I can't hold an umbrella and push a pram, and for obvious reasons my coat wouldn't button up.
It really amazed me how someone can be so stupid not to notice a heavily pregnant woman with one child already, and just nochalantly comment with "Why not walk?". The walk to the other side of town, was slow, but I had time since I had planned to take the bus early and wait a half an hour at the clinic. At this point I was hoping to dry out with those 30 extra minutes mostly. Also, the walk is about a mile away, while not uncomfortable in the best of conditions, and usually done within 30 minutes, took me over an hour and 15 minutes, and this was only making it to the middle of town.
I realized at this point something was wrong, because these contractions were getting worse; and making me stop in my tracks to pant. Which was making an already grumpy mummy more miserable. (Try saying that ten times fast!) So with about 10 minutes to get to the clinic left, I was only just now in the middle of town, and I still had a hill to walk up that looked to me to be mount olympus in my condition. So, stubbornly, I tried going up it, and about 100 steps into this process I had to turn back around and go to the taxi rank. While out of my way, it would get me faster to the clinic than I was able to. I had to admit defeat at this point because I didn't want to be late, and I was in a lot of pain, besides I now added a headache to my bad day due to my still screaming child. She really hates water of any sort.
Upon reaching the clinic, my child remained fussy no matter what I did, but I was able to get in to see the doctor and that went fairly smoothly. I got my order for prescription medication I was out of, and I was able to sneak in a quick check of my daughter who had still been sick from a viral infection a few weeks back. We had also just found out my mother-in-law had bronchitis and I was hoping she hadn't passed it along to my child. Anyways, everything checked out, and I feel horrible for that poor doctor as she was such a sweet young woman and I must have seem like the most mean spirited person ever. I just wasn't my normal smiley cheerful self.
Since these contractions at this point resembled real ones, and not braxton-hicks, I decided to head over to the hospital to ask advice of the midwife since it's right next door to where I was anyway. After picking up my prescription, which they told me they didn't have enough in stock of, so they would have to have me come pick it up again tomorrow (WHAT? Another trip to the other side of town in my condition?! UGH!), I headed out even more peeved at my luck today. Upon reaching the maternity ward, they were dealing with the very end of a delivery, and another woman who was in active labor came up behind me as I rang the bell. I just wondered at this point, if the day could get any worse. I really had no idea.
The charge nurse answered, and I squeezed in their tiny office, with a now complacant daughter because she had fallen asleep, thankfully, and told them my situation. Only to be told that I had to wait until the midwife could see me. So after much thumb-twiddling, I was then told I couldn't be seen by the midwife, from the midwife herself because I was only 35 weeks along and they didn't do checks or anything for anyone less than 37 weeks and that I would need to go to Bath in order to make sure I wasn't going into labor, or there wasn't any problems with the baby. Unfortunatly, since I wasn't in active labor, they wouldn't be able to provide an ambulance for me as well. This wasn't even taking into account the fact I have another child to care for and see she gets to the hospital with me!
I Really Needed A Brick Wall to Bang My Head Against Right Then.
Or maybe I could have just screamed bloody murder. But I handle stress well, and I went into action instead of melt-down. I had little choice really but to pull my husband out of work, yet again, for the third time this year to get arrangements for me to go to the hospital. You have to remember I mentioned my mother-in-law with bronchitis. She was going to be useless. And my father-in-law? Well he was on a honeymoon with his soon-to-be wife, in Morroco for another week and a half. I was going to get little help from my husband's family. I called up Alex and told him I'd meet him at home, then I shelled out for another taxi to take me home, promising the midwife that I would go to bath as soon as I possibly could. After reaching home, I just wanted to lay down and sleep, because I was so tired, but my daughter wouldn't go back to sleep and still hadn't eaten anything since 8am, and it was now almost 1pm. At least I didn't have to walk across town to home! I got on my knees at this point just to pray because I really needed to feel calmer about all this. The thought of going to bath when I had been up there and admitted just last month, was the most detestable thing ever. It's not that I wasn't concerned about the health of my child, it was more like, I just hate being away from my family and home.
I really relish my job, my husband, my child, so disrupting that schedule is really hard for me. And as I said my husband had to leave work early to come get me, I couldnt be making him look good at the work place. I was feeling guilty, in pain, hungry and really tired- not to mention wet still. Things seemed to be looking up however with my husband home an hour later, because I was able to unload what had happened so far to him, and try and work out a game plan from here. We couldn't reasonably take Natasha up with us, and yet, Alex wanted to stay with me incase I had the baby, so he couldnt stay to watch natasha. We called upon the lovely people in our church to help, and while they were able to help watch natasha, getting up to Bath was still proving similar to walking to the moon. In the end, we asked our friend from the Military of Defense if he could take off work early to take us up to bath. He wasn't too happy about this, but he was our very last option, and is practically like family to Alex and myself.
Geoff, the surrogate uncle to alex, came to our rescue and we all, including Natasha, went up to bath. I got admitted, and put on moniter, and really calmed down a lot knowing at this point whatever happened, it would be okay. It was not a little past 4 pm, and I was really exhausted. Stress had started to take it's toll, and I just wanted to know if I was having this baby now, or in two weeks from now just to get it over and done with! They consulted with my doctor and decided to just let me labor if it happened since my contractions were regular and see where it went.
After a few hours, my husband went home, and got all the arrangements with natasha figured out, he then continued my efforts of getting the house ready, while I just played the waiting game to see if my contractions got worse/more regular. I did find out I was 35wk 5days along, so if the baby did come it wouldn't be as bad as just turning my 34th week. I stayed in that ward all night long, my husband coming to up to visit around 8-9pm. I had the longest night of my life as well, as at 10 they told me I was exactly 1 cm dialated, and my contractions were getting worse. So it looked as if by morning I might actually start active labor! I stayed up till 4 am due to the contractions, and passed out sitting up, with my glasses on, from 4-7, having not even moved! If that whole ordeal was not enough, the contractions went away by midmorning and getting checked again only proved that I was no longer dialated at all!
(Note to readers: For those uncomfortable with graphic details of birth or the birthing experience please continue after the next two paragraphs.):
I think personally I still am dialated, as I know from my first pregnancy how hard it is to check me. I don't know why that is, but with my first pregnancy the doctor and nurses both joked about it while making my husband turn beat red, because really, the only way it's hard to check, length wise, is if you've naturally becomes shaped that way. I dont think I need to elaborate more on THAT matter! It's still a running joke between me and my husband BTW. And if a woman doctor 6foot something with VERY large hands has a hard time telling if I'm dialated (and she's done this for YEARS) then a short, very small handed, Indian female doctor is not going to have much success.(besides it was VERY painful to have her check, and I know when someone is getting it right by now I hope! IT IS my body!!)
But I have noticed something in the doctoring profession and that is, it's easier to say "no" with something uncertain, than the doctor admitting they can't do it. The first person who checked me used the proper speculum, I still maintain this indian doctor should have as well. She also tried to convince me not to have breech delivery. She really must have thought I was some sort of dinglebat because she was just so rude, and her oppinion was THE oppinion. I really dislike doctors like that, and wish I could have gotten a second, proper, oppinion on if I was dialated because when I joked "I didn't know you could Un-dialate!" they didnt reply, or laugh, and so I really don't think that's possible. But I will reasearch the matter later.
-------------------------------------------------------------
(For those who skipped the last paragraph, You have not missed much of the story, just my personal oppinion on a few matters concerning how pregnancy works, and is not nessecary to the story! :) Please continue from this point onward):
In the end, I was sent home that evening, my contractions irregular as they were on sunday, and told not to do anything strenuous. Like thats possible with a house to maintain and an 18 month old to look after!! But I am back home now, and I've slept loads this evening, even with contractions, it's easier to do that in your own home than at a hospital. And I am really grateful the NHS exists to moniter me and help me, even if I do take some of the doctors oppinions with a grain of salt. When you see that many different doctors in a day, you tend to have to form your own oppinions based on the fact than what the doctors tell you. For me I just rely on the spirit, and the spirit and body tells me, this baby is getting ready for a normal vaginal birth and I am quite happy to let it! So, I have an appointment on the 29th, and tomorrow I am officially 36 weeks pregnant. On the 29th if the baby hasn't turned head down, then they will try to do it for me, and even if it doesnt i'm still going to try and deliver the baby naturally. I feel very strongly this is the right thing to do for my situation, and in no way would I make this choice with out careful spiritual, and physical confirmation. Being told to trust your instincts is one of the best advice out there. And besides my doctor wants me to try and labor it away, and is really supportive, So hopefully it will all go smooth sailing and no more contractions until the ACTUAL birth.
It started with contractions on sunday at 35 weeks pregnant. By monday I had shrugged them off and started getting the house hold ready (cleaning and such) for the baby. Packing my bags for the hospital in the next 4 weeks, and going to a doctors appointment that morning.
It was one of those really terribly cold and miserable mornings, and my mood was all over the place. I didn't feel like writing, the contractions from the day before we're like having a bee next to my ear that wouldn't go away, and I wasn't looking forward to going all the way across town in the rain and cold. It was dark, damp, and gross outside, and all I have in the way of shoes is 2 pairs of sandals, and a pair of ballerina pumps. I opted for the last option, and cleverly found a solution to my problems: Get a bus across town. So I figured out the time I needed to be out there waiting and rushed around getting everything ready.
By the time I got to where I thought the bus stop was, it wasnt there. I asked a few other hurried people if they knew where it was, and the they all seemed to look at me like I was stupid and said it would be faster to walk there. And yes, when you're healthy, not pushing a pram in the rain, and not 35 weeks pregnant with contractions that morning, walking WOULD be easier! However that was not the case for me. In the end I looked up and down the street only to be at a loss for this bus stop, and fearing missing my appointment, I had little choice but to walk. By this time my daughter is screaming, and I'm pretty much soaked through since I can't hold an umbrella and push a pram, and for obvious reasons my coat wouldn't button up.
It really amazed me how someone can be so stupid not to notice a heavily pregnant woman with one child already, and just nochalantly comment with "Why not walk?". The walk to the other side of town, was slow, but I had time since I had planned to take the bus early and wait a half an hour at the clinic. At this point I was hoping to dry out with those 30 extra minutes mostly. Also, the walk is about a mile away, while not uncomfortable in the best of conditions, and usually done within 30 minutes, took me over an hour and 15 minutes, and this was only making it to the middle of town.
I realized at this point something was wrong, because these contractions were getting worse; and making me stop in my tracks to pant. Which was making an already grumpy mummy more miserable. (Try saying that ten times fast!) So with about 10 minutes to get to the clinic left, I was only just now in the middle of town, and I still had a hill to walk up that looked to me to be mount olympus in my condition. So, stubbornly, I tried going up it, and about 100 steps into this process I had to turn back around and go to the taxi rank. While out of my way, it would get me faster to the clinic than I was able to. I had to admit defeat at this point because I didn't want to be late, and I was in a lot of pain, besides I now added a headache to my bad day due to my still screaming child. She really hates water of any sort.
Upon reaching the clinic, my child remained fussy no matter what I did, but I was able to get in to see the doctor and that went fairly smoothly. I got my order for prescription medication I was out of, and I was able to sneak in a quick check of my daughter who had still been sick from a viral infection a few weeks back. We had also just found out my mother-in-law had bronchitis and I was hoping she hadn't passed it along to my child. Anyways, everything checked out, and I feel horrible for that poor doctor as she was such a sweet young woman and I must have seem like the most mean spirited person ever. I just wasn't my normal smiley cheerful self.
Since these contractions at this point resembled real ones, and not braxton-hicks, I decided to head over to the hospital to ask advice of the midwife since it's right next door to where I was anyway. After picking up my prescription, which they told me they didn't have enough in stock of, so they would have to have me come pick it up again tomorrow (WHAT? Another trip to the other side of town in my condition?! UGH!), I headed out even more peeved at my luck today. Upon reaching the maternity ward, they were dealing with the very end of a delivery, and another woman who was in active labor came up behind me as I rang the bell. I just wondered at this point, if the day could get any worse. I really had no idea.
The charge nurse answered, and I squeezed in their tiny office, with a now complacant daughter because she had fallen asleep, thankfully, and told them my situation. Only to be told that I had to wait until the midwife could see me. So after much thumb-twiddling, I was then told I couldn't be seen by the midwife, from the midwife herself because I was only 35 weeks along and they didn't do checks or anything for anyone less than 37 weeks and that I would need to go to Bath in order to make sure I wasn't going into labor, or there wasn't any problems with the baby. Unfortunatly, since I wasn't in active labor, they wouldn't be able to provide an ambulance for me as well. This wasn't even taking into account the fact I have another child to care for and see she gets to the hospital with me!
I Really Needed A Brick Wall to Bang My Head Against Right Then.
Or maybe I could have just screamed bloody murder. But I handle stress well, and I went into action instead of melt-down. I had little choice really but to pull my husband out of work, yet again, for the third time this year to get arrangements for me to go to the hospital. You have to remember I mentioned my mother-in-law with bronchitis. She was going to be useless. And my father-in-law? Well he was on a honeymoon with his soon-to-be wife, in Morroco for another week and a half. I was going to get little help from my husband's family. I called up Alex and told him I'd meet him at home, then I shelled out for another taxi to take me home, promising the midwife that I would go to bath as soon as I possibly could. After reaching home, I just wanted to lay down and sleep, because I was so tired, but my daughter wouldn't go back to sleep and still hadn't eaten anything since 8am, and it was now almost 1pm. At least I didn't have to walk across town to home! I got on my knees at this point just to pray because I really needed to feel calmer about all this. The thought of going to bath when I had been up there and admitted just last month, was the most detestable thing ever. It's not that I wasn't concerned about the health of my child, it was more like, I just hate being away from my family and home.
I really relish my job, my husband, my child, so disrupting that schedule is really hard for me. And as I said my husband had to leave work early to come get me, I couldnt be making him look good at the work place. I was feeling guilty, in pain, hungry and really tired- not to mention wet still. Things seemed to be looking up however with my husband home an hour later, because I was able to unload what had happened so far to him, and try and work out a game plan from here. We couldn't reasonably take Natasha up with us, and yet, Alex wanted to stay with me incase I had the baby, so he couldnt stay to watch natasha. We called upon the lovely people in our church to help, and while they were able to help watch natasha, getting up to Bath was still proving similar to walking to the moon. In the end, we asked our friend from the Military of Defense if he could take off work early to take us up to bath. He wasn't too happy about this, but he was our very last option, and is practically like family to Alex and myself.
Geoff, the surrogate uncle to alex, came to our rescue and we all, including Natasha, went up to bath. I got admitted, and put on moniter, and really calmed down a lot knowing at this point whatever happened, it would be okay. It was not a little past 4 pm, and I was really exhausted. Stress had started to take it's toll, and I just wanted to know if I was having this baby now, or in two weeks from now just to get it over and done with! They consulted with my doctor and decided to just let me labor if it happened since my contractions were regular and see where it went.
After a few hours, my husband went home, and got all the arrangements with natasha figured out, he then continued my efforts of getting the house ready, while I just played the waiting game to see if my contractions got worse/more regular. I did find out I was 35wk 5days along, so if the baby did come it wouldn't be as bad as just turning my 34th week. I stayed in that ward all night long, my husband coming to up to visit around 8-9pm. I had the longest night of my life as well, as at 10 they told me I was exactly 1 cm dialated, and my contractions were getting worse. So it looked as if by morning I might actually start active labor! I stayed up till 4 am due to the contractions, and passed out sitting up, with my glasses on, from 4-7, having not even moved! If that whole ordeal was not enough, the contractions went away by midmorning and getting checked again only proved that I was no longer dialated at all!
(Note to readers: For those uncomfortable with graphic details of birth or the birthing experience please continue after the next two paragraphs.):
I think personally I still am dialated, as I know from my first pregnancy how hard it is to check me. I don't know why that is, but with my first pregnancy the doctor and nurses both joked about it while making my husband turn beat red, because really, the only way it's hard to check, length wise, is if you've naturally becomes shaped that way. I dont think I need to elaborate more on THAT matter! It's still a running joke between me and my husband BTW. And if a woman doctor 6foot something with VERY large hands has a hard time telling if I'm dialated (and she's done this for YEARS) then a short, very small handed, Indian female doctor is not going to have much success.(besides it was VERY painful to have her check, and I know when someone is getting it right by now I hope! IT IS my body!!)
But I have noticed something in the doctoring profession and that is, it's easier to say "no" with something uncertain, than the doctor admitting they can't do it. The first person who checked me used the proper speculum, I still maintain this indian doctor should have as well. She also tried to convince me not to have breech delivery. She really must have thought I was some sort of dinglebat because she was just so rude, and her oppinion was THE oppinion. I really dislike doctors like that, and wish I could have gotten a second, proper, oppinion on if I was dialated because when I joked "I didn't know you could Un-dialate!" they didnt reply, or laugh, and so I really don't think that's possible. But I will reasearch the matter later.
-------------------------------------------------------------
(For those who skipped the last paragraph, You have not missed much of the story, just my personal oppinion on a few matters concerning how pregnancy works, and is not nessecary to the story! :) Please continue from this point onward):
In the end, I was sent home that evening, my contractions irregular as they were on sunday, and told not to do anything strenuous. Like thats possible with a house to maintain and an 18 month old to look after!! But I am back home now, and I've slept loads this evening, even with contractions, it's easier to do that in your own home than at a hospital. And I am really grateful the NHS exists to moniter me and help me, even if I do take some of the doctors oppinions with a grain of salt. When you see that many different doctors in a day, you tend to have to form your own oppinions based on the fact than what the doctors tell you. For me I just rely on the spirit, and the spirit and body tells me, this baby is getting ready for a normal vaginal birth and I am quite happy to let it! So, I have an appointment on the 29th, and tomorrow I am officially 36 weeks pregnant. On the 29th if the baby hasn't turned head down, then they will try to do it for me, and even if it doesnt i'm still going to try and deliver the baby naturally. I feel very strongly this is the right thing to do for my situation, and in no way would I make this choice with out careful spiritual, and physical confirmation. Being told to trust your instincts is one of the best advice out there. And besides my doctor wants me to try and labor it away, and is really supportive, So hopefully it will all go smooth sailing and no more contractions until the ACTUAL birth.
Monday, November 19, 2007
1 'nana, 2 'nana, 3 'nana- four!
Natasha is quickly growing into the smartest little girl I know. Yesterday she wouldn't stop counting everything. "Nana" is her word for Grandma, but it's also her word for banana. She loves picking up items placing them in a certain order and going, one, "t", free, foor, "t". The T stands for two, and she can't really say the other words properly yet, but it's still the most adorable thing I've ever seen.
I really need to get some pictures up to show you all. It's so cute.
Another adorable thing she started saying yesterday was "HelloO" yes, with the extra all important "o". She tends to talk like an american that way, saying things almost like a question at the end all the time. Yesterday she got hooked on it before bed time because I go to: Webcam with my mother.
Who it was shocking to see. I haven't seen her face in almost two years, and the last two years weren't to kind on her features. Suddenly to me, she really looked her age, and then some. The last surgery she had must have been hard to recover from. But the way her eyes sparkled, and how she was so happy to see natasha and myself made me so happy. She really was crying, and it was gorgeous to see her. I wish she were more involved with the church because then she could take comfort that we would all be family together someday.
But for now, instead of worrying about all that, I simply let natasha wave her arms out like a loon, and saying HelloO! Yesterday was a perfect day, with a perfect nights rest, and was exactly what I needed to refill my spiritual and emotional cup.
I really need to get some pictures up to show you all. It's so cute.
Another adorable thing she started saying yesterday was "HelloO" yes, with the extra all important "o". She tends to talk like an american that way, saying things almost like a question at the end all the time. Yesterday she got hooked on it before bed time because I go to: Webcam with my mother.
Who it was shocking to see. I haven't seen her face in almost two years, and the last two years weren't to kind on her features. Suddenly to me, she really looked her age, and then some. The last surgery she had must have been hard to recover from. But the way her eyes sparkled, and how she was so happy to see natasha and myself made me so happy. She really was crying, and it was gorgeous to see her. I wish she were more involved with the church because then she could take comfort that we would all be family together someday.
But for now, instead of worrying about all that, I simply let natasha wave her arms out like a loon, and saying HelloO! Yesterday was a perfect day, with a perfect nights rest, and was exactly what I needed to refill my spiritual and emotional cup.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Learning the Hard Way
I remember growing up how my mother would always admonish me to put the dirty clothes in the basket instead of the bathroom floor. And each morning for my shower, the clothes, and towels, hair brush, and my brain would be picked up off the floor and put in the laundry basket by my mother.
How entertaining it is to know what it means to be a mother now. I constantly follow after my 18-month-old picking up her items, and teaching her how to sweep, mop, put away, and organize. She loves it, but it's hard to do these things having never really done them before in my life.
In fact over the past five days, I have started to iron for the first time in my life. I'm now sporting 4 battle wounds on my arms that make it look like I intentionally hurt myself, (It Really IS the iron!!) and each attempt to make clothes wrinkleless gets only slightly better.
At least practicing on children clothing is easy.
Why is it that some unknown factor in the universe makes every pregnant woman from about 6 months onward become this nesting cleaning machine. Because for me, if I stay still too long my legs start twitiching and I get the itch to do something! Anything! I've never had such a clean house, in fact, I worry I'll be able to keep it up after the new child is here (or if that's even important! LOL).
But I am learning slowly, the hard way, it's taken almost 3 years for my skills to reach passable, and only just now do I feel like I've left the plateau and headed to higher footing on the homemaking front. This all coming from a woman who cant sew on buttons, who never washed anything by hand, who played most the days of her child hood, and who's only homemaking skill was organization. This from the person who never ironed, never cleaned her own room, and was basically spoilt rotten. It's not like my parents didnt try to teach me! It's more like my brother bailed me out a lot. In fact, the best of my cooking skills before now was french toast.
But now, I'm proud to say I can make a half decent pizza. I can make bread that doesnt fall in the middle, and I only burn myself 50% of the time. I thought becoming a mother entitled you automatically to all the secret knowledge of savvy cleaning know-how. Boy was I wrong! And my poor arms and fingers are showing the battle scars of a girl-woman trying her best to be adult for her children.
I just have to keep asking myself, what's adult again?
How entertaining it is to know what it means to be a mother now. I constantly follow after my 18-month-old picking up her items, and teaching her how to sweep, mop, put away, and organize. She loves it, but it's hard to do these things having never really done them before in my life.
In fact over the past five days, I have started to iron for the first time in my life. I'm now sporting 4 battle wounds on my arms that make it look like I intentionally hurt myself, (It Really IS the iron!!) and each attempt to make clothes wrinkleless gets only slightly better.
At least practicing on children clothing is easy.
Why is it that some unknown factor in the universe makes every pregnant woman from about 6 months onward become this nesting cleaning machine. Because for me, if I stay still too long my legs start twitiching and I get the itch to do something! Anything! I've never had such a clean house, in fact, I worry I'll be able to keep it up after the new child is here (or if that's even important! LOL).
But I am learning slowly, the hard way, it's taken almost 3 years for my skills to reach passable, and only just now do I feel like I've left the plateau and headed to higher footing on the homemaking front. This all coming from a woman who cant sew on buttons, who never washed anything by hand, who played most the days of her child hood, and who's only homemaking skill was organization. This from the person who never ironed, never cleaned her own room, and was basically spoilt rotten. It's not like my parents didnt try to teach me! It's more like my brother bailed me out a lot. In fact, the best of my cooking skills before now was french toast.
But now, I'm proud to say I can make a half decent pizza. I can make bread that doesnt fall in the middle, and I only burn myself 50% of the time. I thought becoming a mother entitled you automatically to all the secret knowledge of savvy cleaning know-how. Boy was I wrong! And my poor arms and fingers are showing the battle scars of a girl-woman trying her best to be adult for her children.
I just have to keep asking myself, what's adult again?
Monday, November 12, 2007
Journal,
I've been neglecting you latly in favor of livejournal. I know, I'm a traitor. But never fear, I am back and ready to type my way into action. I've been lurking around other journals, but I just haven't felt like posting here. I am not sure why, maybe because I've been talking to my family a lot on the phone and havent felt to update everyone here.
But things have been happening, and mostly on a personal level. I feel like i've raised myself to a new standard for happiness. Alex and I for sometime now have done scriptures and prayers nightly, now we've extended that to personal prayer/scripture time, and I've even pursued this in the morning as well.
I am doing www.flylady.com, to help me become organized with day to day things, and I'm really enjoying trying to push myself. I had a sort of ephifany recently, and If you're interested, it has to do with lovely Alma, chapter 7. Everything in there seems to apply to me right now, and I especially loves how it alks about in verse 23 of being humble and submissive.
Yesterday I got a phone call from both my mother and father on the same thing: We jsut bought a webcam and want to talk to you on it. Strangly enough I had similar reactions to both. Shock and weirdness. I dont know about you, but I feel like a whale right now at the end of pregnancy and anything but all togther. I wonder what Dad looks like? Anyways, I'm going forward with this because I love my parents. Both of them. Even if it's a bit scary for me haha. (much more scary about my dad than my mom...really strange that it happened on the same day however!!)
Anyways, I must away now journal, as life goes on and my time to write is limited. I will soon catch you up on more things as I try and evolve into the best mummy and wife I can be.
I've been neglecting you latly in favor of livejournal. I know, I'm a traitor. But never fear, I am back and ready to type my way into action. I've been lurking around other journals, but I just haven't felt like posting here. I am not sure why, maybe because I've been talking to my family a lot on the phone and havent felt to update everyone here.
But things have been happening, and mostly on a personal level. I feel like i've raised myself to a new standard for happiness. Alex and I for sometime now have done scriptures and prayers nightly, now we've extended that to personal prayer/scripture time, and I've even pursued this in the morning as well.
I am doing www.flylady.com, to help me become organized with day to day things, and I'm really enjoying trying to push myself. I had a sort of ephifany recently, and If you're interested, it has to do with lovely Alma, chapter 7. Everything in there seems to apply to me right now, and I especially loves how it alks about in verse 23 of being humble and submissive.
Yesterday I got a phone call from both my mother and father on the same thing: We jsut bought a webcam and want to talk to you on it. Strangly enough I had similar reactions to both. Shock and weirdness. I dont know about you, but I feel like a whale right now at the end of pregnancy and anything but all togther. I wonder what Dad looks like? Anyways, I'm going forward with this because I love my parents. Both of them. Even if it's a bit scary for me haha. (much more scary about my dad than my mom...really strange that it happened on the same day however!!)
Anyways, I must away now journal, as life goes on and my time to write is limited. I will soon catch you up on more things as I try and evolve into the best mummy and wife I can be.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Natasha's Blog
If anyone is interested I have started a live journal blog specifically about Natasha. Where this one is just the general on-goings of my family, the Natasha Journal is all about Natasha. It is under friends only and requires you to sign up with Livejournal to view it. And let me know you signed up so I can add you. I'm addressing this mostly to my Mother and Grandma as I think they will be interested in this. Due to the personal nature of journal it won't be accessible to the general public. It has dates/names and places I'd rather not disclose online.
Anyways, Each entry is done by month, and has a bunch of pictures from that month, starting from her birth until now. Please LEAVE ME A MESSAGE HERE or contact me via email/phone so I can help you get on live journal and see her own journal. I'm finnally organizing all those baby pictures. Go me.
I want to finish this project before the new child comes so I can have two seperate journals for each child and they will know when they get older what it was like for them as babies. I find this an important task for me to do, just as much as geneology, and I'm very excited for it to be close to completed/up to date.
Anyways, Each entry is done by month, and has a bunch of pictures from that month, starting from her birth until now. Please LEAVE ME A MESSAGE HERE or contact me via email/phone so I can help you get on live journal and see her own journal. I'm finnally organizing all those baby pictures. Go me.
I want to finish this project before the new child comes so I can have two seperate journals for each child and they will know when they get older what it was like for them as babies. I find this an important task for me to do, just as much as geneology, and I'm very excited for it to be close to completed/up to date.
Monday, October 08, 2007
Blogging, Ranting and Friendships
I started this blog with the intent of keeping my family and friends on the other side of the pond in touch with me since it would be more accessible than the live journal one, it's also easier to post pictures for everyone to view.
Unfortunatly I've really started to hate blogging. Maybe it's because it doesn't seem to matter. The people I want to touch don't comment, and I'm not even sure if they read it, and the people I do want to get to know better are impossible to know through blogs.
So I'm venting here, it seems appropriate since it's about blogger to vent here. I'm tired of making superficial friends through blogs (not just this one specifically) and of generally being unable to connect with others. I've also been having this problem on the hoem front and many of my old friends have been trying to get in contact with me, to only feel like they don't want to be my friend, just to have what they always had: an ear to listen to.
I at least have Liz and Carol and I'm really grateful for them. I hope to continue to cultivate friendships with them, but it's really frustrating trying to expand having friends. Even people who call me from church are only interested in either information or help. I hope I odn't come across that way myself.
Anyways, Carol is coming over this week to help me out a bit with some housework stuff since I've been really sick. Although by Thursday I could be back to work and fine and normal :) (fingers crossed anyway) And today I see Liz, which will be great she's such a good friend of mine. I think I'll make her a card today to tell her thanks.
I'm just generally feeling pessimistic about the friends front online and needing to find that fufillment elsewhere is hard when I have one child and another on the way. It will be good to move to trowbridge because there's no playgroups where I live that are free and I can't afford to go to ones you have to pay. It would be lovely to meet some other women who have similiar intersts as me.
Unfortunatly I've really started to hate blogging. Maybe it's because it doesn't seem to matter. The people I want to touch don't comment, and I'm not even sure if they read it, and the people I do want to get to know better are impossible to know through blogs.
So I'm venting here, it seems appropriate since it's about blogger to vent here. I'm tired of making superficial friends through blogs (not just this one specifically) and of generally being unable to connect with others. I've also been having this problem on the hoem front and many of my old friends have been trying to get in contact with me, to only feel like they don't want to be my friend, just to have what they always had: an ear to listen to.
I at least have Liz and Carol and I'm really grateful for them. I hope to continue to cultivate friendships with them, but it's really frustrating trying to expand having friends. Even people who call me from church are only interested in either information or help. I hope I odn't come across that way myself.
Anyways, Carol is coming over this week to help me out a bit with some housework stuff since I've been really sick. Although by Thursday I could be back to work and fine and normal :) (fingers crossed anyway) And today I see Liz, which will be great she's such a good friend of mine. I think I'll make her a card today to tell her thanks.
I'm just generally feeling pessimistic about the friends front online and needing to find that fufillment elsewhere is hard when I have one child and another on the way. It will be good to move to trowbridge because there's no playgroups where I live that are free and I can't afford to go to ones you have to pay. It would be lovely to meet some other women who have similiar intersts as me.
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Hopeful Encounters
Have you ever had a premonition that something really great is going to happen to you soon? I am having that feeling like something is going to happen to change my world in the next few days. Maybe it's because life has been so on the edge for me latly, or maybe I'm just strange but I can't shake the feeling that each time I pick up the phone, or look over my shoulder something amazing is going to transpire.
I've had these premonitions before, but not usually about good things, usually it's right before something terrible happens. But I've started having the weirdest dreams concerning this one, to being reuinted with family that I have here in England, to finding an amazing art job. I'm just holding my breath at this point and I can't stop smiling.
Even the fickle english weather is in agreement with me today: It's going to be a gorgeous day!
I've had these premonitions before, but not usually about good things, usually it's right before something terrible happens. But I've started having the weirdest dreams concerning this one, to being reuinted with family that I have here in England, to finding an amazing art job. I'm just holding my breath at this point and I can't stop smiling.
Even the fickle english weather is in agreement with me today: It's going to be a gorgeous day!
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
A Long Silence Explained
So everyone, I have not been around on my blog simply because, for the second time this year, I was admitted to the hospital via ambulance. This time my stay was 5 torturous days away from my beloved family.
The cause: Blood clots in my left leg and lungs.
Thursday night I was up all night with a very sick daughter, and having difficulty breathing myself, I assumed I was also coming down with this chest infection and decided that seeing the doctor the next day would be the best plan of action. Little did I know that my symptoms and my families illness were very different things.
How does one know they have a blood clot you ask? Easy, You don't until it's rather serious. In my case it was having a leg that was constantly cramping, and tender and swolen, along with inablity to breath properly somewhat similar to asthma, or a severe asthma attack only it just keeps going on and on. There can also be a dry cough along with this and just a general feeling of unwell.
This all seemed rather vague to me at the time too.
But after taking my blood pressure and getting a high reading of 78 over 45 I realized that something a bit more serious was going on. I've NEVER seen my blood pressure that low before, and it does run low in me already. I also had a very low amount of oxygen in my blood stream and was put on a breathing machine, and my white blood cell count was unusually high.
All that doesn't mean a whole lot to me except that doing anything normal felt like I was running a marathon. The first few days I was admitted it was so bad the nurses wouldnt even allow me to go to the bathroom 15 feet away, they brought one to me, which is never a pleasant experiance! LOL.
So I went into an x-ray test of my lungs the 2nd day I was there, and they confirmed it WASNT anything to do with pneumonia, chest infection, leaking lungs, ect ect. and just made them more suspicious of clots. The next day was followed by a chest Scan, which is different in an x-ray in that it's more dangerous for me and the baby, and they were looking at my blood vessils not the organs. They inject you with a dye into your blood stream which makes you have a hot flush all the way from your head to your toes and last about a minute and a half, and then they put in you this big Tube that looked like a blue metalic, large, Krispy Kreme. This test came back with no diagnostic at all meaning they just didn't get a clear enough scan to see anything and they weren't going to risk putting me under that much radiation again. It's scary enough thinking I might not be able to breast feed because of this as it is.
Anyways, after this I was getting frustrated and couldn't see when my time here would end. If they'd just find Proof of blood clots they could send me home with the medication they were already giving me (Clexane) and I would be ok. Of course I didn't realize how weak I actually was until I came home last night and walking from the car to my bed was exhausting. In any case I was just pining for my family and normality and to have this illness leave me.
Some people never get sick, and never have anything wrong with them health wise, and then other people, myself included, can't seem to stay out of the hospital. It's rather annoying actually. Maybe I just have a lot to learn spiritually from all this illness in myself? It's not like I treat my body badly, I'm very healthy and concious of my body and what it needs. Which is why I was able to getthis fixed before it killed me, because it does kill many young mothers who are pregnant and don't recognize the symptoms. That's what my doctor told me anyway (how's that for reassurance?).
So, Day 4 I am really getting fed up with hospital food and have been moved from two different units to a respitory unit with 5 other women in my room. Two of them have pneumonia and I'm just praying I can't catch it because I know me and my body and it would have a laugh having blood clots and then getting sick because I was around other illnesses. I also found out that I was getting an ultrasound done on my left leg to find any blood clots. By now I've been on Clexane, an inject based blood thinner, for 4 days and it has made me feel a billion times better. I'm weak but I can at least breath with out oxygen anymore. The scan showed I had a blood clot in my left calf, so, with all that reasoning and the way I came in so ill, they decided to pin me down as having had blood clots in my lungs as well and with my proof I pushed to go home.
You see, even if you get sick, real life goes on with out you. I was not only missing the precious words and Sentences my daughter had started babbling with out me, but my husband had to get back to work so he could get his precoursework done before his business training trip on the 8th of October. (whew that was a run-on, mouthful sentence!) I was dreading the state of the house in my husbands care for five days, and I just didn't want to be stuck in a bed any longer! so I did everything in my powere to show them I was ok, to stop taking paracetamol, (which was for the chest pain that's mostly gone away) to actually walking that 15 feet to the bathroom. I also made an effort to take off those dreaded open backed dressing gowns in favor of normal clothes. I was not going to stay for 2 or 3 more days while the doctors tried to "decided" if I had any clots in my lungs or not. I had one in my leg and that was proof enough for me. The medication that would cure the one in my leg would do the same for the one or more in my lungs. (if there are any at all there- which by the way was never found out!)
So to make a long story short, I got bumped up from having a midwife to having an obtrician for my pregnancy and I will most likely be induced for this pregnancy because of the blood thinners I'm taking. I'm at more of a high risk now that I've had blood clots and they want to time when I haev the baby so I'm not still on the medication, which is useful when giving birth requires a lot of blood letting anyway.
Also, they don't want to stop it too soon because I could reform other blood clots in that time between stopping and having the baby which is also very risking when birthing a child. So, I don;t think I'll be getting my dream of a home birth at this rate.
But I take solace in the fact the Holy Ghost prompted me to see a doctor and I was so quickly diagnosed and taken care of. I am grateful my health is returned to me (mostly) and that I am back home where I belong with my beloved family. Heavenly Father has seen fit to be so merciful at this time to our family and I am so incredibly grateful to him and the gospel for giving my family and my self peace on this matter and keeping the daughter in my womb healthy as well.
The cause: Blood clots in my left leg and lungs.
Thursday night I was up all night with a very sick daughter, and having difficulty breathing myself, I assumed I was also coming down with this chest infection and decided that seeing the doctor the next day would be the best plan of action. Little did I know that my symptoms and my families illness were very different things.
How does one know they have a blood clot you ask? Easy, You don't until it's rather serious. In my case it was having a leg that was constantly cramping, and tender and swolen, along with inablity to breath properly somewhat similar to asthma, or a severe asthma attack only it just keeps going on and on. There can also be a dry cough along with this and just a general feeling of unwell.
This all seemed rather vague to me at the time too.
But after taking my blood pressure and getting a high reading of 78 over 45 I realized that something a bit more serious was going on. I've NEVER seen my blood pressure that low before, and it does run low in me already. I also had a very low amount of oxygen in my blood stream and was put on a breathing machine, and my white blood cell count was unusually high.
All that doesn't mean a whole lot to me except that doing anything normal felt like I was running a marathon. The first few days I was admitted it was so bad the nurses wouldnt even allow me to go to the bathroom 15 feet away, they brought one to me, which is never a pleasant experiance! LOL.
So I went into an x-ray test of my lungs the 2nd day I was there, and they confirmed it WASNT anything to do with pneumonia, chest infection, leaking lungs, ect ect. and just made them more suspicious of clots. The next day was followed by a chest Scan, which is different in an x-ray in that it's more dangerous for me and the baby, and they were looking at my blood vessils not the organs. They inject you with a dye into your blood stream which makes you have a hot flush all the way from your head to your toes and last about a minute and a half, and then they put in you this big Tube that looked like a blue metalic, large, Krispy Kreme. This test came back with no diagnostic at all meaning they just didn't get a clear enough scan to see anything and they weren't going to risk putting me under that much radiation again. It's scary enough thinking I might not be able to breast feed because of this as it is.
Anyways, after this I was getting frustrated and couldn't see when my time here would end. If they'd just find Proof of blood clots they could send me home with the medication they were already giving me (Clexane) and I would be ok. Of course I didn't realize how weak I actually was until I came home last night and walking from the car to my bed was exhausting. In any case I was just pining for my family and normality and to have this illness leave me.
Some people never get sick, and never have anything wrong with them health wise, and then other people, myself included, can't seem to stay out of the hospital. It's rather annoying actually. Maybe I just have a lot to learn spiritually from all this illness in myself? It's not like I treat my body badly, I'm very healthy and concious of my body and what it needs. Which is why I was able to getthis fixed before it killed me, because it does kill many young mothers who are pregnant and don't recognize the symptoms. That's what my doctor told me anyway (how's that for reassurance?).
So, Day 4 I am really getting fed up with hospital food and have been moved from two different units to a respitory unit with 5 other women in my room. Two of them have pneumonia and I'm just praying I can't catch it because I know me and my body and it would have a laugh having blood clots and then getting sick because I was around other illnesses. I also found out that I was getting an ultrasound done on my left leg to find any blood clots. By now I've been on Clexane, an inject based blood thinner, for 4 days and it has made me feel a billion times better. I'm weak but I can at least breath with out oxygen anymore. The scan showed I had a blood clot in my left calf, so, with all that reasoning and the way I came in so ill, they decided to pin me down as having had blood clots in my lungs as well and with my proof I pushed to go home.
You see, even if you get sick, real life goes on with out you. I was not only missing the precious words and Sentences my daughter had started babbling with out me, but my husband had to get back to work so he could get his precoursework done before his business training trip on the 8th of October. (whew that was a run-on, mouthful sentence!) I was dreading the state of the house in my husbands care for five days, and I just didn't want to be stuck in a bed any longer! so I did everything in my powere to show them I was ok, to stop taking paracetamol, (which was for the chest pain that's mostly gone away) to actually walking that 15 feet to the bathroom. I also made an effort to take off those dreaded open backed dressing gowns in favor of normal clothes. I was not going to stay for 2 or 3 more days while the doctors tried to "decided" if I had any clots in my lungs or not. I had one in my leg and that was proof enough for me. The medication that would cure the one in my leg would do the same for the one or more in my lungs. (if there are any at all there- which by the way was never found out!)
So to make a long story short, I got bumped up from having a midwife to having an obtrician for my pregnancy and I will most likely be induced for this pregnancy because of the blood thinners I'm taking. I'm at more of a high risk now that I've had blood clots and they want to time when I haev the baby so I'm not still on the medication, which is useful when giving birth requires a lot of blood letting anyway.
Also, they don't want to stop it too soon because I could reform other blood clots in that time between stopping and having the baby which is also very risking when birthing a child. So, I don;t think I'll be getting my dream of a home birth at this rate.
But I take solace in the fact the Holy Ghost prompted me to see a doctor and I was so quickly diagnosed and taken care of. I am grateful my health is returned to me (mostly) and that I am back home where I belong with my beloved family. Heavenly Father has seen fit to be so merciful at this time to our family and I am so incredibly grateful to him and the gospel for giving my family and my self peace on this matter and keeping the daughter in my womb healthy as well.
Monday, September 24, 2007
I have had a wonderful spiritual confirmation that the job I am doing and what I am doing for my family is the right thing For Me :) It's been a huge comfort to me when others have discouraged me on this path, or weren't sure I could do it.
Thankfully my husband has never been a part of that group of people and I am grateful for his support and understanding in all this. In fact I think he feels quite the opposite! He couldn't be more thrilled. Sure there are times he misses me, but for the most part I have struck a good balance between work, home and family life.
I am so thankful to Heavenly Father for his kindness and support on this. I haven't been this sure about my path since I asked if I should marry Alex in the first place. And it's a wonderful feeling to know I'm doing God's bidding. I feel free.
Thankfully my husband has never been a part of that group of people and I am grateful for his support and understanding in all this. In fact I think he feels quite the opposite! He couldn't be more thrilled. Sure there are times he misses me, but for the most part I have struck a good balance between work, home and family life.
I am so thankful to Heavenly Father for his kindness and support on this. I haven't been this sure about my path since I asked if I should marry Alex in the first place. And it's a wonderful feeling to know I'm doing God's bidding. I feel free.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Sickness and Work
Today I work instead of going to church, but the need was greater at work and I know Heavenly Father is not upset. Also, my family is sick, Natasha is on her last leg and Alex is in the middle of it. Sweating, dehydration, snotty nose, cough and sore throat is the symptoms, but I am determined not to get sick!
I have worked friday and Saturday today and tomorrow. So I can't get sick, I have things I have to do.
So last month alex and I tried to surprise each other by paying off a store credit card from home base. Only this resulted in being 200.00 plus in the account and no way to refund it back to the bank. LOL. So....Alex got me a table and chairs with the money for my birthday. It's a beatiful oak set with mole skin material seats that go all the way up the back. It's gorgeous. Here's a link of what it looks like: http://www.homebase.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?storeId=20001&langId=-1&catalogId=1500000751&productId=1500121661&Trail=C$cip=1500006955>C$cip=1500007029>C$cip=1500007031&categoryId=1500007031
Anyways, it's made me really happy and we've have to rearrange everything to make it fit in the room. Alex is being so kind and is getting the missionaries around wednesday on his day off to fix the problem. I'm in a huge nesting phase right now so I don't think she could say no if he wanted to.
The carvinal was last night, and the fair is in town. If alex wasn't sick I'd ask him to go with me and get Glen to babysit. But he is and I dont want to make our family more sick!
DND is temporarily on hold while we figure out a good day to do it on, since I work saturday evenings now I dont like playing DND from 1-4 then going straight to work afterwards. I like to have a day off once in a while, and besides saturdays should be dedicated part of the day to the family. Sundays are at least :)
Anyways, that's all I have to update for now until I get some pictures on the computer. Life just keeps plugging away!
I have worked friday and Saturday today and tomorrow. So I can't get sick, I have things I have to do.
So last month alex and I tried to surprise each other by paying off a store credit card from home base. Only this resulted in being 200.00 plus in the account and no way to refund it back to the bank. LOL. So....Alex got me a table and chairs with the money for my birthday. It's a beatiful oak set with mole skin material seats that go all the way up the back. It's gorgeous. Here's a link of what it looks like: http://www.homebase.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?storeId=20001&langId=-1&catalogId=1500000751&productId=1500121661&Trail=C$cip=1500006955>C$cip=1500007029>C$cip=1500007031&categoryId=1500007031
Anyways, it's made me really happy and we've have to rearrange everything to make it fit in the room. Alex is being so kind and is getting the missionaries around wednesday on his day off to fix the problem. I'm in a huge nesting phase right now so I don't think she could say no if he wanted to.
The carvinal was last night, and the fair is in town. If alex wasn't sick I'd ask him to go with me and get Glen to babysit. But he is and I dont want to make our family more sick!
DND is temporarily on hold while we figure out a good day to do it on, since I work saturday evenings now I dont like playing DND from 1-4 then going straight to work afterwards. I like to have a day off once in a while, and besides saturdays should be dedicated part of the day to the family. Sundays are at least :)
Anyways, that's all I have to update for now until I get some pictures on the computer. Life just keeps plugging away!
Monday, September 17, 2007
More New Items
This week is my birthday, on wednesday actually, but I'm not celebrating until Thursday because that is my day off and alex's day off :)
My daughter is no longer in the care of the childminder except for this wednesday which is the last day. So instead today and Friday she'll be going to a nursery near by. I'm sure she'll love it, and I feel a bit more confident putting her in a nursery than a child minder.
Anyways, Things are going well here and work is keeping me busy. Life is good and church was lovely. They are renovating our church building right now so it's a bit crazy taking natasha there as it's all dusty and things are pulled apart in certain rooms.
Only 3 short months until the baby is born and I hardly feel pregnant most days, it's just gone by so quickly. I don't really have much more to update since its just so busy but much of the same old same old. When I get some stories to tell, I'll share :)
My daughter is no longer in the care of the childminder except for this wednesday which is the last day. So instead today and Friday she'll be going to a nursery near by. I'm sure she'll love it, and I feel a bit more confident putting her in a nursery than a child minder.
Anyways, Things are going well here and work is keeping me busy. Life is good and church was lovely. They are renovating our church building right now so it's a bit crazy taking natasha there as it's all dusty and things are pulled apart in certain rooms.
Only 3 short months until the baby is born and I hardly feel pregnant most days, it's just gone by so quickly. I don't really have much more to update since its just so busy but much of the same old same old. When I get some stories to tell, I'll share :)
Friday, September 14, 2007
Idiotics moments and Great Friends
Yesterday I realized I was reading my schedule wrong. Between finding child care, starting the new job 6 days ago, and dealing with housework, church, and a leaking water heater that needs replacing (which falls into my hands to find a plumber and fix apparently..) I've just been completely overwhelmed! And what makes it worse is I even put in my own blog the wrong times I work..and I was reading that from the military times from my official acceptance letter.
Thank goodness Barb is so sweet because she just laughed at me..i'm sure they'll all come up with a new nick name for me after this! But the weird thing is I only got 2 of the days hours wrong and not the whole schedule.
Monday: 3-9 (check!)
Wednesday: 5-10 (WRONG!) it's 3-10!
Friday: Same as above...3-10..and I had also thought htis was 5-10 >.<
and Saturday: IS actually 5-10. Which is may have been where I was getting confused. I think even the rota people were confused because they thought I came in all week 3-9...So I'm really confused but I'm going to come in today at 3. At least my daughters day care starts at 2. I was trying to figure out why I had it so early for wednesday and friday when i start at 5. What a mess I made for myself. lol.
Anyways, this means I'll be working almost as much as alex since he works 28 hours a week and I work 23.5. Plus I have to care for the house and our daughter. He just gets to put her to bed when he comes home basically. And I have to get up in the morning to take care of him too before he heads to work. I feel like I have 2 jobs now. But I wouldnt give it up for the world. I'm not actually ocmplaining, I'm just really proud of myself from not falling over sideways from this. I know I need to do this for my own sanity because I just can't handle not having a job really and watching Natasha just wasn't challenging enough.
Maybe I'll change my mind after two kids, but I'm quite happy with how many hours and how things are now. :) Alex and I have been having such a great last few days. We have been having a lot of fun in the evenings after I come home from work, and on my days off in the evening. We played charades the other day and laughed so hard that my sides ached. I'm also really happy because I've gained a lot less weight with this pregnancy than with my last one, and I feel really healthy. This pregnancy is just wizzing by.
Also my birthday is coming up. And yesterday I spent my day off outside with Liz all day and she was so lovely! Her kids had a blast and I chased them around the botanical gardens in bath park. I'm so taking my grandma there. She would love it! It's so peaceful and beautiful, and a wonderful way to spend the day!
Alex says he has a suprise for me for my birthday and I'm really excited to find out what it is. My birthday is next wednesday but we're celebrating the day after since I work on my b-day. I also need to let Steve know I can't cover for him on thursday since it is my b-day party ^_^ I figure I will make myself a Chocolate cake and icing and let alex take care of the rest of the stuff. Knowing him he'll forget the cake haha. I also got my first birthday card yesterday from my grandma and that cheered me up immensely.
I'm very glad for all these things in my life, including work, and to know I'm helping my family get a home and to be financially stable. It's wonderful to feel needed.
Thank goodness Barb is so sweet because she just laughed at me..i'm sure they'll all come up with a new nick name for me after this! But the weird thing is I only got 2 of the days hours wrong and not the whole schedule.
Monday: 3-9 (check!)
Wednesday: 5-10 (WRONG!) it's 3-10!
Friday: Same as above...3-10..and I had also thought htis was 5-10 >.<
and Saturday: IS actually 5-10. Which is may have been where I was getting confused. I think even the rota people were confused because they thought I came in all week 3-9...So I'm really confused but I'm going to come in today at 3. At least my daughters day care starts at 2. I was trying to figure out why I had it so early for wednesday and friday when i start at 5. What a mess I made for myself. lol.
Anyways, this means I'll be working almost as much as alex since he works 28 hours a week and I work 23.5. Plus I have to care for the house and our daughter. He just gets to put her to bed when he comes home basically. And I have to get up in the morning to take care of him too before he heads to work. I feel like I have 2 jobs now. But I wouldnt give it up for the world. I'm not actually ocmplaining, I'm just really proud of myself from not falling over sideways from this. I know I need to do this for my own sanity because I just can't handle not having a job really and watching Natasha just wasn't challenging enough.
Maybe I'll change my mind after two kids, but I'm quite happy with how many hours and how things are now. :) Alex and I have been having such a great last few days. We have been having a lot of fun in the evenings after I come home from work, and on my days off in the evening. We played charades the other day and laughed so hard that my sides ached. I'm also really happy because I've gained a lot less weight with this pregnancy than with my last one, and I feel really healthy. This pregnancy is just wizzing by.
Also my birthday is coming up. And yesterday I spent my day off outside with Liz all day and she was so lovely! Her kids had a blast and I chased them around the botanical gardens in bath park. I'm so taking my grandma there. She would love it! It's so peaceful and beautiful, and a wonderful way to spend the day!
Alex says he has a suprise for me for my birthday and I'm really excited to find out what it is. My birthday is next wednesday but we're celebrating the day after since I work on my b-day. I also need to let Steve know I can't cover for him on thursday since it is my b-day party ^_^ I figure I will make myself a Chocolate cake and icing and let alex take care of the rest of the stuff. Knowing him he'll forget the cake haha. I also got my first birthday card yesterday from my grandma and that cheered me up immensely.
I'm very glad for all these things in my life, including work, and to know I'm helping my family get a home and to be financially stable. It's wonderful to feel needed.
Friday, September 07, 2007
Mama Nirvana's Meme
Rules: 1.You have to post these rules before you give the facts. 2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of their middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had. 3. When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts. 4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. 5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.
Middle Name: Sue
S -- Sulky; I hate being a sore loser but it's so true, when I don't get my way I tend to pout- a lot.
U -- Understanding; I like to listen to people talk about themselves and commisserate the best I can.
E -- Economical; thanks to my husband I have a good head on my shoulders about money and i'm really good at finding the cheapest deals on anything. :)
1. Do you like cheese? I love cheese,but I can't eat it a lot as I'm lactose intolerant.
2. Have you ever been arrested? No.
3. Have you ever shot a gun? Nope, I didn't in america and thankfully can't in England.
4. Your favorite song? Any song by Rialto.
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Not really, I only ever did with a gynocologist..lol
6. What do you think of when you eat hot dogs? I don't eat hot dogs.
7. What's your favorite Christmas song? Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Water
9. Can you do push ups? er I can do the kind on the edge of a chair. Like 5 in total lol.
10. Is your bathroom clean? Yes, I just cleaned it yesterday.
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? Besides my wedding/engagment rings, I also wear a watch all the time except when washing dishes and taking a bath.
12. Favorite Hobby? Painting, napping, writing in my journals.
13. What are you listening to right now? The hum of the washer
14. What is the last thing you ate? A piece of toast for breakfast.
15. What one trait do you hate about yourself? I tend to judge people too easily sometimes.
16. Middle Name? Sue.
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? Where is my anti-acid tablets? Why can't I find the picture I was using for my oil painting reference, and Will I have any clean underwear by the time I go to work?
18. Name the last 3 things you have bought. A bottle of water, a fruit bar for my daughter, and puddy erasers.
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink. Diet Coke, Water, Hot Chocolate/Herbal Tea
20. Current worry right now? The damp patch on the floor that keeps spreading in our entry hallway, and inability to get ahold of my landlady to fix it.
21. Current hate? Cleaning the kitchen and hoovering the living room.
22. Favorite place to be? Cuddled up next to my husband.
23. How did you bring in the New Year? Taking down the christmas decorations and going to bed early :)
24. What is your quirkiest habit? Tiding things away so even I can't find them O.o
25. Name three people who will complete this and return? Jenn most likely.
26. How many siblings do you have? One younger brother and step-sister.
27. Do you own slippers? I do but I dont wear them right now as they are hiding in some unknown "tidied away" place.
28. What shirt are you wearing? I'm not wearing a shirt, it's a dress.
29. What shampoo do you use? The cheapest possible.
30. Favorite colors? Turquoise, Blue, Green, Orange
31. Would you like to be a pirate? Why?
32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't have a shower.
33. Favorite female name? Natasha, and Rosemary, Grace
34. Favorite male name? William, Adrian, Julian
35. What's in your pockets right now? No pockets.
36. Last thing that made you laugh? My daughter blowing raspberries on my tummy for the first time.
37. Best bed sheets as a child? Can't remmeber. I may have had care bear ones.
38. Worst injury you've ever had? When I was 7 my brother hit me in the middle of my head with a hammer and I had to go to the emergency room.
39. When's your birthday? 19th of September 1985.
40. How many TVs do you have in your house? Only one, unless you count the computer as well.
41. Who is your loudest friend? My husband, he has a lovely booming voice.
43. Does someone have a crush on you? Well I know my husband does if that counts..
44. Do you wish on shooting stars? Yup.
45.What is your favorite book? Right now it's the Courage to Heal.
46.What is your favorite age? SO far 22 is looking to be like a great year for me. :)
47. What song do/did you want played at your wedding? Cathrines Wheel- Rialto
48. What song do you want played at your funeral? There is sunshine in my soul today.
49. What were you doing at 12 am this morning? Going to the bathroom for the 4th time.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? It's morning already?
Middle Name: Sue
S -- Sulky; I hate being a sore loser but it's so true, when I don't get my way I tend to pout- a lot.
U -- Understanding; I like to listen to people talk about themselves and commisserate the best I can.
E -- Economical; thanks to my husband I have a good head on my shoulders about money and i'm really good at finding the cheapest deals on anything. :)
1. Do you like cheese? I love cheese,but I can't eat it a lot as I'm lactose intolerant.
2. Have you ever been arrested? No.
3. Have you ever shot a gun? Nope, I didn't in america and thankfully can't in England.
4. Your favorite song? Any song by Rialto.
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Not really, I only ever did with a gynocologist..lol
6. What do you think of when you eat hot dogs? I don't eat hot dogs.
7. What's your favorite Christmas song? Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Water
9. Can you do push ups? er I can do the kind on the edge of a chair. Like 5 in total lol.
10. Is your bathroom clean? Yes, I just cleaned it yesterday.
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? Besides my wedding/engagment rings, I also wear a watch all the time except when washing dishes and taking a bath.
12. Favorite Hobby? Painting, napping, writing in my journals.
13. What are you listening to right now? The hum of the washer
14. What is the last thing you ate? A piece of toast for breakfast.
15. What one trait do you hate about yourself? I tend to judge people too easily sometimes.
16. Middle Name? Sue.
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? Where is my anti-acid tablets? Why can't I find the picture I was using for my oil painting reference, and Will I have any clean underwear by the time I go to work?
18. Name the last 3 things you have bought. A bottle of water, a fruit bar for my daughter, and puddy erasers.
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink. Diet Coke, Water, Hot Chocolate/Herbal Tea
20. Current worry right now? The damp patch on the floor that keeps spreading in our entry hallway, and inability to get ahold of my landlady to fix it.
21. Current hate? Cleaning the kitchen and hoovering the living room.
22. Favorite place to be? Cuddled up next to my husband.
23. How did you bring in the New Year? Taking down the christmas decorations and going to bed early :)
24. What is your quirkiest habit? Tiding things away so even I can't find them O.o
25. Name three people who will complete this and return? Jenn most likely.
26. How many siblings do you have? One younger brother and step-sister.
27. Do you own slippers? I do but I dont wear them right now as they are hiding in some unknown "tidied away" place.
28. What shirt are you wearing? I'm not wearing a shirt, it's a dress.
29. What shampoo do you use? The cheapest possible.
30. Favorite colors? Turquoise, Blue, Green, Orange
31. Would you like to be a pirate? Why?
32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't have a shower.
33. Favorite female name? Natasha, and Rosemary, Grace
34. Favorite male name? William, Adrian, Julian
35. What's in your pockets right now? No pockets.
36. Last thing that made you laugh? My daughter blowing raspberries on my tummy for the first time.
37. Best bed sheets as a child? Can't remmeber. I may have had care bear ones.
38. Worst injury you've ever had? When I was 7 my brother hit me in the middle of my head with a hammer and I had to go to the emergency room.
39. When's your birthday? 19th of September 1985.
40. How many TVs do you have in your house? Only one, unless you count the computer as well.
41. Who is your loudest friend? My husband, he has a lovely booming voice.
43. Does someone have a crush on you? Well I know my husband does if that counts..
44. Do you wish on shooting stars? Yup.
45.What is your favorite book? Right now it's the Courage to Heal.
46.What is your favorite age? SO far 22 is looking to be like a great year for me. :)
47. What song do/did you want played at your wedding? Cathrines Wheel- Rialto
48. What song do you want played at your funeral? There is sunshine in my soul today.
49. What were you doing at 12 am this morning? Going to the bathroom for the 4th time.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? It's morning already?
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Working Mama's
So, yesterday at work I got to chit chat with a lovely woman called Alice. She's also 25 weeks pregnant and her baby is due on the 22nd of December, while mine is the 19th. How lovely is that? We had a lot in common and really hit it off.
She's so different from most women I meet now-a-days, since my circle of women influence has mostly been either my mother in law, or other lds SAHM's. She's 25 weeks pregnant and working 2 jobs, one full time and the one I'm at part time. She just got married to an African man, who from the pictures seems to be lovely, and just bought their first home.
She is a real inspiration to me. I realize that being a stay at home mom is a lovely thing to accomplish. Especially if you have 2+ children, however, helping your family to survive and to have a home to live in (instead of constantly uprooting them as we are at the moment..) is also a lovely thing to do.
I once again come back to the difference in cultures, and ideas, and striking a balance between being a mummy and being a woman. Maybe she tips the scales too much with that much work, but heck I can't say I'm doing much less with trying to get my art business up and running. However mine makes it possible to be there for Natasha all day long. Anyways, it was a breath of fresh air to hear the oppinion of another woman and what they want to do with their maternity time and life compared to the LDS women I have talked to.
I realize this is a bit controversial of me, but I promise I'm not making fun of any LDS women's choices on staying home or not after children. I told Alice that priorities and life drastically changes after the baby is born and all thsoe sure plans seem to go out the window when you're dreading to go back into the work force that first year! At least that's how it was for me :)
I know I will want to spend a few months with this new child as well. I wasnt getting antsy for work until about 8-9months old with Natasha. Any oppinions on this?
She's so different from most women I meet now-a-days, since my circle of women influence has mostly been either my mother in law, or other lds SAHM's. She's 25 weeks pregnant and working 2 jobs, one full time and the one I'm at part time. She just got married to an African man, who from the pictures seems to be lovely, and just bought their first home.
She is a real inspiration to me. I realize that being a stay at home mom is a lovely thing to accomplish. Especially if you have 2+ children, however, helping your family to survive and to have a home to live in (instead of constantly uprooting them as we are at the moment..) is also a lovely thing to do.
I once again come back to the difference in cultures, and ideas, and striking a balance between being a mummy and being a woman. Maybe she tips the scales too much with that much work, but heck I can't say I'm doing much less with trying to get my art business up and running. However mine makes it possible to be there for Natasha all day long. Anyways, it was a breath of fresh air to hear the oppinion of another woman and what they want to do with their maternity time and life compared to the LDS women I have talked to.
I realize this is a bit controversial of me, but I promise I'm not making fun of any LDS women's choices on staying home or not after children. I told Alice that priorities and life drastically changes after the baby is born and all thsoe sure plans seem to go out the window when you're dreading to go back into the work force that first year! At least that's how it was for me :)
I know I will want to spend a few months with this new child as well. I wasnt getting antsy for work until about 8-9months old with Natasha. Any oppinions on this?
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Well my husband nicked the scan photos before I could make copies. He's going to show them all around work :) I myself have a lot of work to do today. But first I'm putting natasha down for her morning nap so when she goes to her day care at 2 pm she doesnt fall asleep in the middle of it. And I need more sleep too >.< I was up at 5 am! It's all I can do to keep my eyes open at the moment.
I have the house to VERY quickly clean. I cleaned most of it on Monday like the bathroom and such, but it's just cluttered very quickly and we dont have many dishes or a dishwasher so the kitchen becomes messy easily. We also use up all our dishes in a day too haha.
Anyways, so besides that I have to get the land lady over here in order to view a damp patch in our carpet that's been forming for the past few weeks. I hope there's no structural problems with the house were in. At least we dont have to worry about it, it's the apartment owners responsibility. Maybe we'll get new carpet!
Then I have to go out and pick up some food from the market today, basic stuff like bread milk veggies..then take natasha to day care at 2. I also want to fit in some art before work. I start work at 5 pm so I do have a lot of time to myself after she heads off to day care. I might do the art then :)
So that's it everyone! Natasha was a doll at the hospital yesterday, and I had a really enjoyable day with my husband in Bath. Such a fun city to visit. He was even able to get the day off to view the scan :)
I have the house to VERY quickly clean. I cleaned most of it on Monday like the bathroom and such, but it's just cluttered very quickly and we dont have many dishes or a dishwasher so the kitchen becomes messy easily. We also use up all our dishes in a day too haha.
Anyways, so besides that I have to get the land lady over here in order to view a damp patch in our carpet that's been forming for the past few weeks. I hope there's no structural problems with the house were in. At least we dont have to worry about it, it's the apartment owners responsibility. Maybe we'll get new carpet!
Then I have to go out and pick up some food from the market today, basic stuff like bread milk veggies..then take natasha to day care at 2. I also want to fit in some art before work. I start work at 5 pm so I do have a lot of time to myself after she heads off to day care. I might do the art then :)
So that's it everyone! Natasha was a doll at the hospital yesterday, and I had a really enjoyable day with my husband in Bath. Such a fun city to visit. He was even able to get the day off to view the scan :)
It's a little girl!
Not only that my expected due date was off by 2 weeks so i'll be having this baby around christmas!! (19th of Decemeber to be correct..) We're going to name her Rosemary(ie?) Sue. We haven't decided on the spelling yet..whatever will be socially in england I think. We're really excited! :D I couldnt beleive it when they put me 2 weeks and six days ahead of my due date..that's just crazy..I have to tell my work now and I'm a bit nervous to do so haha.
But right now I'm too excited to care, or to sleep. :) I am officially 24 weeks 7 days..er or 25 weeks along :D
But right now I'm too excited to care, or to sleep. :) I am officially 24 weeks 7 days..er or 25 weeks along :D
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Today is the day of the baby scan, which I'll update this post as soon as I come back, or tomorrow morning :)
I'm excited to be going out to bath as it's a lovely city with many things to do, I will probably leave around 12-1 and have lunch in bath and then go to the park there, and then go to the scan at the hospital. I do love browsing around that city and it's so close I just have to take the oppertunity to go when I can.
Maybe I should print off some art fliers and such and hit the local library there to see if I can post my artwork. Anyways it should be a great day :)
The sun is shining and I'm really happy.
I'm excited to be going out to bath as it's a lovely city with many things to do, I will probably leave around 12-1 and have lunch in bath and then go to the park there, and then go to the scan at the hospital. I do love browsing around that city and it's so close I just have to take the oppertunity to go when I can.
Maybe I should print off some art fliers and such and hit the local library there to see if I can post my artwork. Anyways it should be a great day :)
The sun is shining and I'm really happy.
Monday, September 03, 2007
New Routines
Good news all around!
After my two days training, which is why I haven't had time to post, I am now starting Asda as a Front End Assistant. Sounds neat doesn't it? Really I deal with cafe and cashiering at the tills. :)
At least this means that I will get into a somewhat normal routine again. I will also see Alex less but it nessecary for us to get on to our own two feet and continue forwards. Besides I'm really looking forward to a job. :)
I will be working Mon 3-9, Wed 5-10 Friday 5-10 and Saturday 5-10.
So i'm searching hard once again for a baby sitter/child minder/creche/nursery. It won't be a problem on Saturdays because alex only works Half days saturdays, and starting 24th of September he will have Wednesdays off as well. This is good because I will still get to spend loads of time with him, and we'll always be able to go to church because he always has Sunday off. Bank Holiday Mondays we'll always have off together as well. (except 2 per year)
I'm a bit sad our routine of dinner together will be disruptet 4 days a week but this really is the only situation our money can afford as far as child care goes, and it still allows me to watch Natasha in the day time. I wouldn't be able to work Night shift in my condition.
The other good news is I finnally got my scan appointment last minute on Friday. So I go in on this Tuesday to get it done, and alex is seeing if he can take tomorrow off by switich a day with his colleague. We're also hoping to see the army recruitment people tomorrow because he is really interested in more information.
So all in all we're looking at a few busy days ahead of us, but at least it includes a lot of family time. :)
I get to start prooving myself to alex by paying tithing too, which is exciting because he says it can be very hard to do. I guess I will find out. I don't think it will be but I know how much tithing has helped me in the past. On both sides of the stick.
I'm still mulling over how long I should take my maternity leave, I'll probably start a week or two before the baby is due, and end some time between 8 weeks and 6 months. In england you get up to 26 weeks provided by the government for maternity leave and the first 4 months are paid half wage.
A friend of mine, Elaine, is taking 9 months off for maternity leave :)
Anyways, I've been really busy and just wanted to give a quick update...when I get more pictures I'll post them!
After my two days training, which is why I haven't had time to post, I am now starting Asda as a Front End Assistant. Sounds neat doesn't it? Really I deal with cafe and cashiering at the tills. :)
At least this means that I will get into a somewhat normal routine again. I will also see Alex less but it nessecary for us to get on to our own two feet and continue forwards. Besides I'm really looking forward to a job. :)
I will be working Mon 3-9, Wed 5-10 Friday 5-10 and Saturday 5-10.
So i'm searching hard once again for a baby sitter/child minder/creche/nursery. It won't be a problem on Saturdays because alex only works Half days saturdays, and starting 24th of September he will have Wednesdays off as well. This is good because I will still get to spend loads of time with him, and we'll always be able to go to church because he always has Sunday off. Bank Holiday Mondays we'll always have off together as well. (except 2 per year)
I'm a bit sad our routine of dinner together will be disruptet 4 days a week but this really is the only situation our money can afford as far as child care goes, and it still allows me to watch Natasha in the day time. I wouldn't be able to work Night shift in my condition.
The other good news is I finnally got my scan appointment last minute on Friday. So I go in on this Tuesday to get it done, and alex is seeing if he can take tomorrow off by switich a day with his colleague. We're also hoping to see the army recruitment people tomorrow because he is really interested in more information.
So all in all we're looking at a few busy days ahead of us, but at least it includes a lot of family time. :)
I get to start prooving myself to alex by paying tithing too, which is exciting because he says it can be very hard to do. I guess I will find out. I don't think it will be but I know how much tithing has helped me in the past. On both sides of the stick.
I'm still mulling over how long I should take my maternity leave, I'll probably start a week or two before the baby is due, and end some time between 8 weeks and 6 months. In england you get up to 26 weeks provided by the government for maternity leave and the first 4 months are paid half wage.
A friend of mine, Elaine, is taking 9 months off for maternity leave :)
Anyways, I've been really busy and just wanted to give a quick update...when I get more pictures I'll post them!
Friday, August 31, 2007
I am so Pissed off!
ok so this morning has been a bit hellish. I slept really badly last night worrying about going to orientation today. Then I woke up with 30 minutes to get ready to go out the door with natasha to take her to a creche before I had to go to the orientation. I missed getting up with alex who politely let me sleep, and was rushing around like a mad woman.
I take natasha to the creche which costs 3.50 an hour and pay a stupidly large amount of money (15.00) GBP for the taxi there and to azda. Only when I get to azda the lady tells me the orientation is ONLY tomorrow and sunday!! What the heck?!?!?!?!
I asked the lady specifically what days it was, and not only was the stupid person on the phone unable to tell me the correct days, she never informed me of what position I got when I asked! To make matters worse, this has been happening ALL week.
I still haven't got my scan for my baby and I have rights dammit. I really angry at the system because I feel like I'm personally being discriminated against in this country simply because I'm american and I sound young on the phone. I've had SO many people ask "Can I speak to your mummy" When I answer the phone. And all of this just makes me blood boil and ARGH!!!
I Am Really. Mad. Today.
End. Rant.
I take natasha to the creche which costs 3.50 an hour and pay a stupidly large amount of money (15.00) GBP for the taxi there and to azda. Only when I get to azda the lady tells me the orientation is ONLY tomorrow and sunday!! What the heck?!?!?!?!
I asked the lady specifically what days it was, and not only was the stupid person on the phone unable to tell me the correct days, she never informed me of what position I got when I asked! To make matters worse, this has been happening ALL week.
I still haven't got my scan for my baby and I have rights dammit. I really angry at the system because I feel like I'm personally being discriminated against in this country simply because I'm american and I sound young on the phone. I've had SO many people ask "Can I speak to your mummy" When I answer the phone. And all of this just makes me blood boil and ARGH!!!
I Am Really. Mad. Today.
End. Rant.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Nursery, Creches, and Playgroups- Oh My!
I am having such a time with finding the right place and spot to put natasha and time is ticking out with having my orientation tomorrow.
Whats even better is that I found this person I really like but they are all the way on the other side of town..if I had a car it would be fine but as it is it's a rediciulous amount to walk. However she did agree to pick natasha up, excluding tomorrow, and so until further notice natasha has found a small creche to stay in.
I will bringing by all the items needed for her by 930am. and then I zip off to work. This should be interesting! I don't know how i'll manage with 2 kids with out a car so i'm really grateful that I am getting a job now and able to help our family get a car >.<
Life is just crazy!
Well I didn't mention that I got the job at Azda but I did so let me back up there. I found out yesterday I got the job only they wanted to do 3 day orientation this week, and I was going to do a lot at church too which is sad because now I have to miss church this weekend :( However my job is only monday's wednesdays and fridays so this won't be a problem most days.
Anyways, life is good and I'm doing well, i just need to work out all the kinks in child care and job stuff and everything else. it's just all so crazy and up in the air right now!
I really wish I knew what to do.
Whats even better is that I found this person I really like but they are all the way on the other side of town..if I had a car it would be fine but as it is it's a rediciulous amount to walk. However she did agree to pick natasha up, excluding tomorrow, and so until further notice natasha has found a small creche to stay in.
I will bringing by all the items needed for her by 930am. and then I zip off to work. This should be interesting! I don't know how i'll manage with 2 kids with out a car so i'm really grateful that I am getting a job now and able to help our family get a car >.<
Life is just crazy!
Well I didn't mention that I got the job at Azda but I did so let me back up there. I found out yesterday I got the job only they wanted to do 3 day orientation this week, and I was going to do a lot at church too which is sad because now I have to miss church this weekend :( However my job is only monday's wednesdays and fridays so this won't be a problem most days.
Anyways, life is good and I'm doing well, i just need to work out all the kinks in child care and job stuff and everything else. it's just all so crazy and up in the air right now!
I really wish I knew what to do.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Praying for Answers
There's much news on the family front! Alex and I are officially working on going to the temple in the next 6 months. I know I know, we've been "planning" for ages now, but due to sitautions outside of our control, it hasn't happened yet, but we have Heavenly Father's Blessing on this now, and I'm sure we'll make it this time!
Yesterday I didn't go out because Glen flaked on me, so I went to the park and spent the afternoon at the park with natasha, and I got some adorable pictures too :)
I will post those pictures very shortly but I also wanted to post about my husbands interest in the army. He's always had an interest in the army and decided against doing it after making the choice to marry me instead. But I promised him, and God to help him with his dreams as well as mine. I don't think it's fair for him to so lovingly support me, only to disregard his own desires. So he's looking at applying to the British Army Intelegence Core. He's a very analytical and scientifical/technical person and this is an oppertunity for schooling, security, and oppertunities it would otherwise be impossible for Alex to get into.
I feel ambivailent about the whole thing. Rationally, I know that going into the Int Corp means he will most likely not be in the heat of battle, I can't stop my prejuidice against the army make me dislike it. At the same time, I really really want and will support my husband in the decisions we make for our family. As it is, with alex's new promotion he may doss it off after doing that for the next six months. The one thing we're decided on is that we need to be sealed in the temple before he tries for the army. We also have decided to seek an answer with God with this and work out all the practical implications it means. I would rather alex took this oppertunity than hit 30 yrs old and always wonder "What if?"
It makes me happy he values himself enough to approach me about his dreams and desires, and that we have such a close relationship. Our relationship has been so sweet lately it makes me cry thinking about it. We're so happy.
Yesterday I didn't go out because Glen flaked on me, so I went to the park and spent the afternoon at the park with natasha, and I got some adorable pictures too :)
I will post those pictures very shortly but I also wanted to post about my husbands interest in the army. He's always had an interest in the army and decided against doing it after making the choice to marry me instead. But I promised him, and God to help him with his dreams as well as mine. I don't think it's fair for him to so lovingly support me, only to disregard his own desires. So he's looking at applying to the British Army Intelegence Core. He's a very analytical and scientifical/technical person and this is an oppertunity for schooling, security, and oppertunities it would otherwise be impossible for Alex to get into.
I feel ambivailent about the whole thing. Rationally, I know that going into the Int Corp means he will most likely not be in the heat of battle, I can't stop my prejuidice against the army make me dislike it. At the same time, I really really want and will support my husband in the decisions we make for our family. As it is, with alex's new promotion he may doss it off after doing that for the next six months. The one thing we're decided on is that we need to be sealed in the temple before he tries for the army. We also have decided to seek an answer with God with this and work out all the practical implications it means. I would rather alex took this oppertunity than hit 30 yrs old and always wonder "What if?"
It makes me happy he values himself enough to approach me about his dreams and desires, and that we have such a close relationship. Our relationship has been so sweet lately it makes me cry thinking about it. We're so happy.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Driving Backwards and Forwards
A Scenery Shot of Bath..Most of bath is live this. Don't you love the cute little corner Icecream Parlor?
So I'm embarking on the cary journey of learning to drive in england! Really everyone else in the world drives on the left side of the road so why am I worrying?
I also have to learn to use a clutch which although I've been driving sicne I was 16, it's always been an automatic.
So I'm sending the papers in, and getting a provisional drivers licence to use until I get my own. I actually have a leg up on alex who has never really been in a car before. At least, not behind the wheel.
I think we might pay to get on our mother-in-laws insurance as well until I turn 25 because of horrendous amount of money it costs otherwise. Eventually, we're hoping alex will get a company car, after a few years and a few promotions.
Anyways, Today alex left the house at 6 am to go out to a convention near London, something about history, and samurais..wars..that kind of thing. I'm sure he will enjoy himself! :)
I'm hoping to take the day to go outside with Glen and Natasha since it's a bank holiday monday and no one is working! I want to go out sightseeing somewhere..only I'm not sure where to go! Maybe Salisbury?
In any case, I'll take pictures! I also wanted to post pictures from yesterdays adventures :)
Our day out at Bath (behind me is Bath Abbey)
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Sunday Blues
After yesterday our whole family was sunburnt and heat exhausted and alex and I barely got 4 hours of sleep each. So we didn't end up going to church, and all of us, including natasha took like 6 hour of naps today. Talk about not putting on enouhg sunscreen and drinking enough water yesterday! We all felt like boiled potatoes and stayed inside as much as possible resting from the sun and our achey skin.
But I have some lovely pictures from yesterday in Bath and I will post them soon...:)
But I have some lovely pictures from yesterday in Bath and I will post them soon...:)
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Today has been a very successful day, the house is spotless, and I really mean that! I got a bunch of little crazy items for my family to ship out soonish, and I also got the art supplies I needed for my business...now I just am waiting for some to come in the mail so I can paint paint paint.
I also picked up some art books to study from the masters thanks to the helpful advice my mother gave me...yay.
Alex and I spent most of the day out at Bath and got some touristy bits and bobs for my family.
I don't really have much more to say except I'm excited to get my stuff to start selling art, like my scanner/printer. I just got my money box today to hold petty cash, and I have my art supplies container, I just need my table cloth things, and to make all the prints of my artwork to display :) I also need to send out more art fliers around bath, because when I bought supplies the lady put up my business cards for me, and that was wonderful, I wasn't even expecting that! It kind of came up out of no where..so I'm really thrilled to be getting seen as it were.
I really need to network better as I'm really new to all this...but here goes nothing! I'm just going to give it my all and see what happens!
I also picked up some art books to study from the masters thanks to the helpful advice my mother gave me...yay.
Alex and I spent most of the day out at Bath and got some touristy bits and bobs for my family.
I don't really have much more to say except I'm excited to get my stuff to start selling art, like my scanner/printer. I just got my money box today to hold petty cash, and I have my art supplies container, I just need my table cloth things, and to make all the prints of my artwork to display :) I also need to send out more art fliers around bath, because when I bought supplies the lady put up my business cards for me, and that was wonderful, I wasn't even expecting that! It kind of came up out of no where..so I'm really thrilled to be getting seen as it were.
I really need to network better as I'm really new to all this...but here goes nothing! I'm just going to give it my all and see what happens!
Yesterday's Hurricane
So yesterday I had a list of about 20 billion things to do, and amazingly I only had three items left by the end of the day!
Andy came over at 8am, and started doing the garden work, then mowed the whole lawn at 9. Natasha had been up since 6 am so I already had her and myself up, ready, and dressed by 8, and she was sitting eatting breakfast at that point. Alex was still home too when Andy came by, and I finished his lunch and sent him off to work.
Then, I started cleaning! Natasha went down for her nap unusually early at 9-9:30ish. so I was able to start laundry, and deep cleaning the kitchen! Then I moved on to the bathroom, living room, and getting the recycling organized and all that. I also reorganized and cleaned natasha's room before she went down for nap. Then I hoovered the whole house. I delt with some financial things on the phone, and by the time I sat down for a break it was almost noon and natasha was awake again!
It was a beautiful sunny day out, and the front lawn and garden were looking gorgeous! I called Andy in and gave him an hour long lunch, feeding natasha myself and him yummy ham sandwhiches! Then after lunch I took a moment to sit down and write my family letters and get their boxes together to send off in the mail today. I had made some pictures recently, and I want to send everyone in the family a little english gift. :) I kept doing more laundry, and then played outside with Natasha for a little while, on the nice cut lawn, and on her little scooter. I need to take pictures of that sometime!
It was starting to get really hot at this point, and after finishing Natasha's bedroom, she was ready to take another short afternoon nap. I put her down at 1:30 and laid down for an hour myself. Unfortunatly I missed Susanne coming by as I was soo tired, I had only had 4 hours of sleep the night before!!
After an hour of shut-eye I got up and helped andy put some items from our garage in the Loft that we've been meaning to do for awhile. It's just amazing what work can get done with 2 people! Andy did the whole garage, took our bike to get fixed, took our recycling out to the dump (rycyling center is right next to it), and did the front and back garden.
Meanwhile the house was starting to sparkle and I felt a deep satisfaction at our hard work! I've never seen a garage so clean before!
At 4:30 I started preping for dinner, cutting up veggies and such, and made roasted veggies, haddock and chips. It was lovely, and I kept andy around for dinner so he could cool down, and take a breather before leaving. Alex was home by 5:15 so it worked out perfectly to have dinner on the table as he walked in the door. :) After andy left alex and I just vegged. We played some Wii for a bit and then I put natasha down to bed, but she had a panic attack at 8:30 and I had to get her out comfort her, change her again, and put her back down around 9:00. Oh I also gave natasha a bath today. I forgot that part. I gave her one in the middle of the day to cool her down and let her run around just in her nappy inside.
Anyways after she was back asleep I passed out myself after scripture and prayer with Alex. And here I am 11 hours of sleep later and groggy and sore from all the hard work yesterday!
Today is going to be just as busy too, with errands to run, grocery shopping to do, the Land lady inspecting the house today, and preparing our lessons for church. We have a lot to get done :)
But before the busy day starts I'm just cleaning and getting a yummy breakfast in bed ready for alex ;) I think it will be a lovely surprise. And natasha takes a nap between 9-10ish to 11-12ish. I'm thinking omlettes and french toast sound lovely!
Andy came over at 8am, and started doing the garden work, then mowed the whole lawn at 9. Natasha had been up since 6 am so I already had her and myself up, ready, and dressed by 8, and she was sitting eatting breakfast at that point. Alex was still home too when Andy came by, and I finished his lunch and sent him off to work.
Then, I started cleaning! Natasha went down for her nap unusually early at 9-9:30ish. so I was able to start laundry, and deep cleaning the kitchen! Then I moved on to the bathroom, living room, and getting the recycling organized and all that. I also reorganized and cleaned natasha's room before she went down for nap. Then I hoovered the whole house. I delt with some financial things on the phone, and by the time I sat down for a break it was almost noon and natasha was awake again!
It was a beautiful sunny day out, and the front lawn and garden were looking gorgeous! I called Andy in and gave him an hour long lunch, feeding natasha myself and him yummy ham sandwhiches! Then after lunch I took a moment to sit down and write my family letters and get their boxes together to send off in the mail today. I had made some pictures recently, and I want to send everyone in the family a little english gift. :) I kept doing more laundry, and then played outside with Natasha for a little while, on the nice cut lawn, and on her little scooter. I need to take pictures of that sometime!
It was starting to get really hot at this point, and after finishing Natasha's bedroom, she was ready to take another short afternoon nap. I put her down at 1:30 and laid down for an hour myself. Unfortunatly I missed Susanne coming by as I was soo tired, I had only had 4 hours of sleep the night before!!
After an hour of shut-eye I got up and helped andy put some items from our garage in the Loft that we've been meaning to do for awhile. It's just amazing what work can get done with 2 people! Andy did the whole garage, took our bike to get fixed, took our recycling out to the dump (rycyling center is right next to it), and did the front and back garden.
Meanwhile the house was starting to sparkle and I felt a deep satisfaction at our hard work! I've never seen a garage so clean before!
At 4:30 I started preping for dinner, cutting up veggies and such, and made roasted veggies, haddock and chips. It was lovely, and I kept andy around for dinner so he could cool down, and take a breather before leaving. Alex was home by 5:15 so it worked out perfectly to have dinner on the table as he walked in the door. :) After andy left alex and I just vegged. We played some Wii for a bit and then I put natasha down to bed, but she had a panic attack at 8:30 and I had to get her out comfort her, change her again, and put her back down around 9:00. Oh I also gave natasha a bath today. I forgot that part. I gave her one in the middle of the day to cool her down and let her run around just in her nappy inside.
Anyways after she was back asleep I passed out myself after scripture and prayer with Alex. And here I am 11 hours of sleep later and groggy and sore from all the hard work yesterday!
Today is going to be just as busy too, with errands to run, grocery shopping to do, the Land lady inspecting the house today, and preparing our lessons for church. We have a lot to get done :)
But before the busy day starts I'm just cleaning and getting a yummy breakfast in bed ready for alex ;) I think it will be a lovely surprise. And natasha takes a nap between 9-10ish to 11-12ish. I'm thinking omlettes and french toast sound lovely!
Friday, August 24, 2007
Eyes Wide Open
So many things to say, and so much I want to express only I'm not sure how to write it out. I am finnally doing my art business that I have been talking about but not actually fufilling because of the small over head it costs to start setting up a stall. Alex is providing me a scanner/printer/fax for my birthday that is absolutly gorgeous and really will be the cinch in my business as I can do my own prints, and be able to put out more artwork since I will be able to make photo quality prints of my photographs to actually paint from. My running list of inventory and taking stock while I get everything set up is not actually as large as I thought it would be and a lot of it is creative thinking on my part in order to get by on the least amount of money. I realize it's only a market stall to some people, but to me it's a personal representation of my artwork and more importantly myself when potential art gallery directors see it.
Granted to start with I'll be in my home town and fairly few people, if anyone, will see my artwork, but I plan on changing that to nearby cities later on. I have my business cards, art pieces, pricing figured out, invetories, silly little items like petty cash lock money box, stands for the tables and even a satin dark cloth for the table. I also will make home made flyers, prints, care guides/rights to original pieces, and laminated page depiciting my sale prices/print sizes.
My most brilliant stroke of genius came from husband who suggested instead of trying to frame and bring every piece, I should scan/take photo of my art work, print it on quality paper and put it in a photo album with a short description. Not only that I will have 3-4 of these displayed on my table. I will have a banner on the front of my table with my company name: Drawings for Life, and underneath will be Originals, Prints, Commissions.
So as you picture this table imagine a dark blue satin table cloth, beside me my art easle, as I will be DOING ART at the place as well as selling. (people love seeing artists work too!) On the front of the table is a stylish caligraphy laminated banner with my Company name and a very basic three options I offer. On the table will be three dark mahagony 4 inch stands holding the best three original oil paints I have to offer, framed and ready to go, from anywhere between 80-200 GBP. I'll have at least 3 black photo albums open and depicting my artwork not with me, and off to my right and the viewers left, will be all the business cards, leaflets, and pricing guides. Only the original pieces will have stickers of prices on them, the rest will be either in the album or worked out via print/size ect.
Eventually if prints become more popular (and I'm sure they'll be what covers overhead..) I'll have a modest display box with print you can buy straight from me, but I need to know first what is popular from my art items and what people are most interested in. Do they want me to sit there and do charactures? Or are they interested in take home oil paintings- originals. Do they want watercolors or drawings? Or a choice of all the above?
All these things need to be ironed out in order to anticipate the buyers wants, and to provide the best services. I will also be offering on this table watercolor postcard sets. My other sets will be in oils, branching off the pear idea of having different fruits made from very small pictures and selling the originals at a modest price and continuing to sell prints as well. All prints will be available for pick up from my home, or waiting until the next week when I open the stall again.
These little projects won't take as much time and will be able to be pumped out by one person realitivly easily.
Other things I have started is having print offers on my Deviant Art web page, getting a free ad in our local yellow pages, and shortly, as I make more art, I will prescribe to one or 2 professional art sites online that sell art originals for you. These won't go to the market with me as most will be bound by contract not to sell prints to anyone else. You just sell through them instead. I have found many good pages that are possible candidates, but I want one with high traffic, and high output. I take my art very seriously now, and will be no more displays of anime, or frilly fantasy art unless I intend to sell it. However themed pieces such as my Egyptian Goddess/mythology will continue to be produced depending on demand.
I have less than a month until Alex switches to his new job, so I want to be up and running by the time he transfers because he will always have wednesday's off and will take care of the tricky situation of taking care of natasha, and by january it will be 2 children. :)
The hardest part of this whole endeavor is not the over head but finding the time between being a mother, getting the house in order day to day, and juggling my artwork. I have to make sure it dries higher up so natasha doesn't get into it, and I also have to keep the room well ventilated, which could be a problem during winter, but hopefully by that time I'll be able to get a studio downtown, they have one at a local art gallery for 100 per month. Which is really really cheap.
Anyways, it's 6am now and Natasha is awake, I need to get up and dressed properly and get the kitchen/living room done firs thing, so when NAtasha does down for her nap at 9 am I'll be able to do some artwork!!
Granted to start with I'll be in my home town and fairly few people, if anyone, will see my artwork, but I plan on changing that to nearby cities later on. I have my business cards, art pieces, pricing figured out, invetories, silly little items like petty cash lock money box, stands for the tables and even a satin dark cloth for the table. I also will make home made flyers, prints, care guides/rights to original pieces, and laminated page depiciting my sale prices/print sizes.
My most brilliant stroke of genius came from husband who suggested instead of trying to frame and bring every piece, I should scan/take photo of my art work, print it on quality paper and put it in a photo album with a short description. Not only that I will have 3-4 of these displayed on my table. I will have a banner on the front of my table with my company name: Drawings for Life, and underneath will be Originals, Prints, Commissions.
So as you picture this table imagine a dark blue satin table cloth, beside me my art easle, as I will be DOING ART at the place as well as selling. (people love seeing artists work too!) On the front of the table is a stylish caligraphy laminated banner with my Company name and a very basic three options I offer. On the table will be three dark mahagony 4 inch stands holding the best three original oil paints I have to offer, framed and ready to go, from anywhere between 80-200 GBP. I'll have at least 3 black photo albums open and depicting my artwork not with me, and off to my right and the viewers left, will be all the business cards, leaflets, and pricing guides. Only the original pieces will have stickers of prices on them, the rest will be either in the album or worked out via print/size ect.
Eventually if prints become more popular (and I'm sure they'll be what covers overhead..) I'll have a modest display box with print you can buy straight from me, but I need to know first what is popular from my art items and what people are most interested in. Do they want me to sit there and do charactures? Or are they interested in take home oil paintings- originals. Do they want watercolors or drawings? Or a choice of all the above?
All these things need to be ironed out in order to anticipate the buyers wants, and to provide the best services. I will also be offering on this table watercolor postcard sets. My other sets will be in oils, branching off the pear idea of having different fruits made from very small pictures and selling the originals at a modest price and continuing to sell prints as well. All prints will be available for pick up from my home, or waiting until the next week when I open the stall again.
These little projects won't take as much time and will be able to be pumped out by one person realitivly easily.
Other things I have started is having print offers on my Deviant Art web page, getting a free ad in our local yellow pages, and shortly, as I make more art, I will prescribe to one or 2 professional art sites online that sell art originals for you. These won't go to the market with me as most will be bound by contract not to sell prints to anyone else. You just sell through them instead. I have found many good pages that are possible candidates, but I want one with high traffic, and high output. I take my art very seriously now, and will be no more displays of anime, or frilly fantasy art unless I intend to sell it. However themed pieces such as my Egyptian Goddess/mythology will continue to be produced depending on demand.
I have less than a month until Alex switches to his new job, so I want to be up and running by the time he transfers because he will always have wednesday's off and will take care of the tricky situation of taking care of natasha, and by january it will be 2 children. :)
The hardest part of this whole endeavor is not the over head but finding the time between being a mother, getting the house in order day to day, and juggling my artwork. I have to make sure it dries higher up so natasha doesn't get into it, and I also have to keep the room well ventilated, which could be a problem during winter, but hopefully by that time I'll be able to get a studio downtown, they have one at a local art gallery for 100 per month. Which is really really cheap.
Anyways, it's 6am now and Natasha is awake, I need to get up and dressed properly and get the kitchen/living room done firs thing, so when NAtasha does down for her nap at 9 am I'll be able to do some artwork!!
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Day Off
I normally let my sunday's be day's off but today has been a classic avoidance of all things exhausting day. I have still cleaned the kitchen and bathroom, but our bedroom has been neglected, and the most strenous thing I plan on doing is laundry, and picking up some parcels from downtown (along with my husband- after work). Yesterday was another busy day filled with tons of things to do, and then I had enrichment that evening, and I just didn't stop, I was out all day running errands in town, and then came home and left 30 mins later. It was amazing I got dinner on the table at all!
So today has been a day I've let my duties slide a bit. But I'll be back on the band wagon tomorrow as I need to make a list tonight for all the different odd and end jobs for our handy man coming by. We need the gardening done, and the garage, and a few paint jobs around the house. None of which alex has the time for, or I can do with natasha/being pregnant. Besides it helps a friend who is need right now :)
Saturday we have our land lady coming aorund to inspect the house, which is why i'm getting to frantic about all the housework and why this week my art has been put on the back burner. Besides I have to tidy it away for Saturday becayse I really doubt my land lady will like the fact I oil paint over the carpet in the bed room,,,even if I do put plastic down!
I also have a few bills to sort out. Yay for that. Ah well, I never officially have a day off when living life, and being a mother!
So today has been a day I've let my duties slide a bit. But I'll be back on the band wagon tomorrow as I need to make a list tonight for all the different odd and end jobs for our handy man coming by. We need the gardening done, and the garage, and a few paint jobs around the house. None of which alex has the time for, or I can do with natasha/being pregnant. Besides it helps a friend who is need right now :)
Saturday we have our land lady coming aorund to inspect the house, which is why i'm getting to frantic about all the housework and why this week my art has been put on the back burner. Besides I have to tidy it away for Saturday becayse I really doubt my land lady will like the fact I oil paint over the carpet in the bed room,,,even if I do put plastic down!
I also have a few bills to sort out. Yay for that. Ah well, I never officially have a day off when living life, and being a mother!
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Pushing Forwards and falling backwards
Today it is only 9 am and I'm already exhausted! I feel tired and burnt out. I think I needed a break and some water! I feel like every day I'm battling dishes and a dirty house, only to see the evening come with more dishes and still a dirty house >.<
I refuse to clean the house more than twice a day. Natasha is getting even more helpful, but at the same time testing all her boundries. And having my friends kids around only makes her act up for days afterwards. It's very frustrating because I love and admire my friend, but I really relaly really don't approve of the way she rears her children. When they were here for the party the other day the little boy tore natasha's room and the living room apart single handed! He was in her crib, climibing bookcases/dressers, on the window sill and tossing toys all over the place! And i had JUST spent that entire day organizing and cleaning Natasha's room.
Now I have to do it all over again...
I dont think I'm going to be the type of mother who throws big parties for my kids, unless it's in neutral territory like a skating rink or a park!
Today however I'm seeing my midwife for my 20 week checkup, and I'm also going to a concert tonight for enrichment activity. It should be lovely and the perfect pick up I need away from the house and natasha. Not that I don't love my family but every once in awhile I just needt o get away or I might scream. Today feels like one of those days I might pull my hair out!
I just don't understand how such a small place can get so dirty so quickly and I really do try to keep it clean! I know I didn't in the past, but I've been working really hard to keep the spirit here by having a lovely clean home.
Anyways, now that I have ranted and had my break I should probably get back to that before I have to rush out the door and go to my appointment! I think I just need to slow down for a minute, say a prayer and then get back to work :)
I refuse to clean the house more than twice a day. Natasha is getting even more helpful, but at the same time testing all her boundries. And having my friends kids around only makes her act up for days afterwards. It's very frustrating because I love and admire my friend, but I really relaly really don't approve of the way she rears her children. When they were here for the party the other day the little boy tore natasha's room and the living room apart single handed! He was in her crib, climibing bookcases/dressers, on the window sill and tossing toys all over the place! And i had JUST spent that entire day organizing and cleaning Natasha's room.
Now I have to do it all over again...
I dont think I'm going to be the type of mother who throws big parties for my kids, unless it's in neutral territory like a skating rink or a park!
Today however I'm seeing my midwife for my 20 week checkup, and I'm also going to a concert tonight for enrichment activity. It should be lovely and the perfect pick up I need away from the house and natasha. Not that I don't love my family but every once in awhile I just needt o get away or I might scream. Today feels like one of those days I might pull my hair out!
I just don't understand how such a small place can get so dirty so quickly and I really do try to keep it clean! I know I didn't in the past, but I've been working really hard to keep the spirit here by having a lovely clean home.
Anyways, now that I have ranted and had my break I should probably get back to that before I have to rush out the door and go to my appointment! I think I just need to slow down for a minute, say a prayer and then get back to work :)
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Busy Bees and Playtimes
After cleaning yesterday the party was a success I think. If a bit of a tight squeeze it was still enjoyable. Today I have visiting teachers over at 10am, and I have been busy busy getting the house reorganized after the party yesterday. Whew. The kids tore it apart and I'm not sure if I am supposed to discipline someone elses child in my own home? Does anyone know anything about that? Natasha doesn't climb up things and try to tear things apart. I can't imagine what some parent's houses look like..and I can only use the excuse of that woman having two children so many times. It's different if she were a single mum and not there all the time, but she IS there all the time. Her way of making up for it however was by trying to take over my hosting bit instead of just enjoying the party haha. I didnt mind really it was just she doesnt seem very comfortable in large crowds. I suspect that she is having TOO much time with just her kids. I know she doesn't really have any hobbies or other things she does besides entertaining her kids.
I am so thankful for my art, and for amother who never gave up on her dreams while still balancing her life with a family. It's given me hope that I can do this too and still raise perfectly healthy children. I do admire my mothers strength of will to get things done and bulldoze her way through life no matter what the obstacles. She would be bored with a life that my friend has with 2 kids and nothing else to do!
I know I would be, and I love my kid(s) dearly. However I have to admit it's hard to juggle artwork, business stuff, house work and a kid. This month I have the new yellow pages coming out and I put my business in the yellow pages, so I'm really excited to see if I get some interest/phone calls!
I realize this whole post is pretty random, but it's been a pretty random morning. Alex woke up with 5 minutes to get ready for work and amazingly I still sent him out the door with breakfast in hand and lunch in a bag. It helps that we had some left overs from the party last night though. :)
Anyways I need to finish cleaning a bit, but I should be posting Scan pictures soon!
I am getting it done very soon since today I am officially 20 weeks along. I made sure I was booked in and had to get rebooked because I wasnt yet. And they need to do the scan between 19-21 weeks. we're also going to find the sex of the baby too, and see if it more than one or not.
So everyone new pictures soon, and lots of love from me! Cheers!
I am so thankful for my art, and for amother who never gave up on her dreams while still balancing her life with a family. It's given me hope that I can do this too and still raise perfectly healthy children. I do admire my mothers strength of will to get things done and bulldoze her way through life no matter what the obstacles. She would be bored with a life that my friend has with 2 kids and nothing else to do!
I know I would be, and I love my kid(s) dearly. However I have to admit it's hard to juggle artwork, business stuff, house work and a kid. This month I have the new yellow pages coming out and I put my business in the yellow pages, so I'm really excited to see if I get some interest/phone calls!
I realize this whole post is pretty random, but it's been a pretty random morning. Alex woke up with 5 minutes to get ready for work and amazingly I still sent him out the door with breakfast in hand and lunch in a bag. It helps that we had some left overs from the party last night though. :)
Anyways I need to finish cleaning a bit, but I should be posting Scan pictures soon!
I am getting it done very soon since today I am officially 20 weeks along. I made sure I was booked in and had to get rebooked because I wasnt yet. And they need to do the scan between 19-21 weeks. we're also going to find the sex of the baby too, and see if it more than one or not.
So everyone new pictures soon, and lots of love from me! Cheers!
Monday, August 20, 2007
I'm so groggy today after sleeping more than I should have, and having some disturbing nightmares. I had a great time at church yesterday and we didnt get home until almost 2 hours later. Our ride had to talk to the bishop and alex had to stay after to deal with some missionary things :)
We're having a cottage evening/FHE with 12 people tonight and I'm going to make rolls and and pasta salad. So wish me luck for energy enough to get it all done. I have to finish cleaning hte kitchen right now, then clean the bathroom, take apart the table and move it to the garage, clean the hampster cage and move it to the bedroom, and do all that cooking.
Alex has been slacking on his bathroom duties so I have to pick up the slack today and get it done. We're going to spend the evening playing board games and doing a spiritual lesson/message theme thing.
It should be a lot of fun. Hopefully I can get it all done so I just need to get off the computer and go do that now. :)
We're having a cottage evening/FHE with 12 people tonight and I'm going to make rolls and and pasta salad. So wish me luck for energy enough to get it all done. I have to finish cleaning hte kitchen right now, then clean the bathroom, take apart the table and move it to the garage, clean the hampster cage and move it to the bedroom, and do all that cooking.
Alex has been slacking on his bathroom duties so I have to pick up the slack today and get it done. We're going to spend the evening playing board games and doing a spiritual lesson/message theme thing.
It should be a lot of fun. Hopefully I can get it all done so I just need to get off the computer and go do that now. :)
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Early Morning Rantings
Today at 430 am I woke up and was unable to go back tosleep. I tried for 30 minutes, tossing and turning, and then realized it was just impossible. At 5 am I got online and got a drink and then became really hungry. Except in my wierdness I'm craving pretzels, the kind I used to get at the mall as a kid. So I think, hey it's 5 am I could make some for breakfast! I browse online for a bit checking out recipes and read reviews then decided on a recipe and here I am making pretzels at a quarter to 6 in the morning. I'm still not tired and I couldn't sleep if I wanted to. Besides the kitchen needed some last minute cleaning and I just can't stand the thought of going to church then coming home to a messy house.
Yesterday was so much fun however! We went to a party for Paddy's birthday, my father in law. That wasn't the fun part, the fun part was coming home and playing DND with Alex and John. We also had pizza and a really good time! We must have playef from 6 to 9pm and I havn't enjoyed myself like that for a long time! Too bad Pete missed out.
Anyways, I am just too full of beans to sit still! Natasha is such a cutie now, she does the most adorable things...two days ago she started initiating the tickle game, where she goes up to our feet and goes "tickle tickle tickle" while trying to tickle them with her fingers. Regardless wether we have shoes on or now haha. It's like a breath of fresh air and always makes alex and myself fall into a fit of giggles. Latley we've been like that though, giggling and laughing together like little kids! I don't know if it's because of our daughter or just because we're at a really good spot in our relationship but it's so lovely. I think I've just learned to let loose with him. I definitly trust him 110% and I can't say that about everyone! (especially guys!)
I think kids have an intrinsic sense if you can be trusted or not because she adores Pete and John who are so akward with kids but try so hard with natasha to be nice to her, she could get away with murder with those two and they would just smile and pat her on the head. Where as get her with in 5 feet of my father in law and she starts screaming and won't let him touch her. Can't say I blame her, he wasn't exactly (and still isn't!) a good father to alex. Sure he helped fininacially, but as most of us know there's so much more to parenting than just providing monetary needs! I also get the whilies around that guy, he has this annoying pet peeve of blantantly kissing me on the lips when he greets me. Sometimes two or three times. I dont know if I'll ever get used to that culture difference, you just dont do that in america! (and besides he's the only guy I know who tried kissing me onthe lips! Everyone else settles for cheek [or even the hand in some cames!])
But then we all know how highly Paddy thinks of himself when he has 5 birthday parties (3 of those being vacations to different countries) just to celebrate his 50th birthday.
Anyways, the pretzels are coming along nicely and I'm sure won't make it through the morning! And what a surprise it will be for Alex when he wakes up :). I know my daugheter is too young to appreciate that I baked them by hand, but alex always appreciates me and I love basking in his appreciation. It's so heart warming to know how completely adored and loved I am by my family. Sometimes I do feel like a big kid!
Yesterday was so much fun however! We went to a party for Paddy's birthday, my father in law. That wasn't the fun part, the fun part was coming home and playing DND with Alex and John. We also had pizza and a really good time! We must have playef from 6 to 9pm and I havn't enjoyed myself like that for a long time! Too bad Pete missed out.
Anyways, I am just too full of beans to sit still! Natasha is such a cutie now, she does the most adorable things...two days ago she started initiating the tickle game, where she goes up to our feet and goes "tickle tickle tickle" while trying to tickle them with her fingers. Regardless wether we have shoes on or now haha. It's like a breath of fresh air and always makes alex and myself fall into a fit of giggles. Latley we've been like that though, giggling and laughing together like little kids! I don't know if it's because of our daughter or just because we're at a really good spot in our relationship but it's so lovely. I think I've just learned to let loose with him. I definitly trust him 110% and I can't say that about everyone! (especially guys!)
I think kids have an intrinsic sense if you can be trusted or not because she adores Pete and John who are so akward with kids but try so hard with natasha to be nice to her, she could get away with murder with those two and they would just smile and pat her on the head. Where as get her with in 5 feet of my father in law and she starts screaming and won't let him touch her. Can't say I blame her, he wasn't exactly (and still isn't!) a good father to alex. Sure he helped fininacially, but as most of us know there's so much more to parenting than just providing monetary needs! I also get the whilies around that guy, he has this annoying pet peeve of blantantly kissing me on the lips when he greets me. Sometimes two or three times. I dont know if I'll ever get used to that culture difference, you just dont do that in america! (and besides he's the only guy I know who tried kissing me onthe lips! Everyone else settles for cheek [or even the hand in some cames!])
But then we all know how highly Paddy thinks of himself when he has 5 birthday parties (3 of those being vacations to different countries) just to celebrate his 50th birthday.
Anyways, the pretzels are coming along nicely and I'm sure won't make it through the morning! And what a surprise it will be for Alex when he wakes up :). I know my daugheter is too young to appreciate that I baked them by hand, but alex always appreciates me and I love basking in his appreciation. It's so heart warming to know how completely adored and loved I am by my family. Sometimes I do feel like a big kid!
Monday, August 13, 2007
Busy Life
Today is filled with lots of little art concerns I need to iron out before Wednesday.
I have to make a matt for one of my pictures, find frames for the rest, set a pricing guide and price for my artwork, and work on some more paintings as well. I also need to find someone to watch natasha for wednesday, so hopefully I can find someone to do that. It'll be too hard for me to do the market with her, but i'm willing to do it if i have to.
I've got to get organized with a lot of little things, and make a care guide for my artwork for those who buy it.
I guess I'll learn as I go along and just try to do more and more artwork.
I keep praying so I hope I can do the best I can!
I have to make a matt for one of my pictures, find frames for the rest, set a pricing guide and price for my artwork, and work on some more paintings as well. I also need to find someone to watch natasha for wednesday, so hopefully I can find someone to do that. It'll be too hard for me to do the market with her, but i'm willing to do it if i have to.
I've got to get organized with a lot of little things, and make a care guide for my artwork for those who buy it.
I guess I'll learn as I go along and just try to do more and more artwork.
I keep praying so I hope I can do the best I can!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Art Endeavors, Meetings, and Dates
Yesterday was quite the day for me!
It wasn't a normal day for me and it was so lovely. I went up to Bristol by myself in the morning to go to a Deviant Art Meeting. It ended up only being me and two other guys, since some of the other people had flaked. It was only going to be 6 people in total originally anyway. I met a northern englander photographer named Ami. That's a male french name apparently. And a local Bristol english photographer, Sam.
I really enjoyed myself, and I forgot what it was like to have guy friends, or indeed any art friends who I had a lot in common with. I didnt feel like a pregnant woman, or a mother, but just an artist out enjoying the sights and sounds of bristol with other artists. We went to the Arnolfini art museum and I hung out with them for 3 hours before I was meeting up with my husband in bristol.
I met him at the Odeon Theater and we watched Transformers at 4 pm. My mother-in-law watched Natasha for us since she would be asleep most of the time. But she didn't watch her until alex left to come meet me at 130pm. We then went out to eat and headed home. We didn't even get to see the balloon fair going on, but that's ok because it was still a full day that was very fun!
I would definitly do another Deviant Art Meeting again as I really had a blast, and I think I've just gained two new friends! Ami's partner is an oil painter and I hope next time there's a Bristol meet that she comes along too! I saw her artwork and it's gorgeous.
It was such a refresher to be away from natasha for a day and get my art stuff done, although I definitly wouldnt want to do that more than like once a month or something..I missed my family a lot! haha. Silly but true!
Anyways I need to get going....church today!
It wasn't a normal day for me and it was so lovely. I went up to Bristol by myself in the morning to go to a Deviant Art Meeting. It ended up only being me and two other guys, since some of the other people had flaked. It was only going to be 6 people in total originally anyway. I met a northern englander photographer named Ami. That's a male french name apparently. And a local Bristol english photographer, Sam.
I really enjoyed myself, and I forgot what it was like to have guy friends, or indeed any art friends who I had a lot in common with. I didnt feel like a pregnant woman, or a mother, but just an artist out enjoying the sights and sounds of bristol with other artists. We went to the Arnolfini art museum and I hung out with them for 3 hours before I was meeting up with my husband in bristol.
I met him at the Odeon Theater and we watched Transformers at 4 pm. My mother-in-law watched Natasha for us since she would be asleep most of the time. But she didn't watch her until alex left to come meet me at 130pm. We then went out to eat and headed home. We didn't even get to see the balloon fair going on, but that's ok because it was still a full day that was very fun!
I would definitly do another Deviant Art Meeting again as I really had a blast, and I think I've just gained two new friends! Ami's partner is an oil painter and I hope next time there's a Bristol meet that she comes along too! I saw her artwork and it's gorgeous.
It was such a refresher to be away from natasha for a day and get my art stuff done, although I definitly wouldnt want to do that more than like once a month or something..I missed my family a lot! haha. Silly but true!
Anyways I need to get going....church today!
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Picture Time!
14/15month old little girl Natasha!
These were all taken about a week ago. Sorry for the slow update...
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